Human Behavior

[royston]

Hi,

I opened up this forum, is to discuss about the human behavior that you may observed either inside or outside Recom. Not necessary to be members of Recom, it can be those people that you deal with daily, your lecturer and so on.

To make it simple, I hope anyone of you who wish to voice out here, please include two key-point in your reply:

1. The apparent behavior that you view and feel by yourself (remember, yourself... you may feel disgusting, sick, hate, like, love, etc. all base on your personal feeling)

2. The detail explanation WHY you have such feeling... base on what examples, what kind of action that particular person has done, why you like/dislike him/her so much and so on...

From this forum, we may know how mature we are when we deal with other people and if possible, after the discussion, what kind of behavior we should have IF we deal with the same type of person again.

By the way, I believe we all are mature, fully-educated. So PLEASE no argue, fighting, anger, personal feeling... all negative behavior exist/involve. Like the Chinese says, "Know yourself, Know others, Win forever". Let's start...

~ roy ~

[__earth]

i think this forum is not appropiate. I forsee a lot of ugly exhange here.

[soul_out]

I think it would be a very good discussion. Everyone may give their own opinion towards a situation, but not everyone have the same opinion. This is definately not a debate, but to see or analyse a situation from various point of view.

I think this discussion is particularly important to those who is graduating soon. Must know a good interpersonal skills and good relationship with your colleagues is playing an important roles to "survive" in a company. If you can't even "survive", how would you achieve your goal and success?

I hope this would be something like PBL, which is Problem Based Learning. Hope Roy can give us a real example in your working life, tell us about your feeling and opinion. I think this would benefit every recom members.

[soul_out]

__earth: What do you mean by ugly exchange? Do you mean those "dirty" and "ugly" office politics which happen every moment in every office in the world?

[royston]

Hi soul-out, I guess earth is trying to say that he forsee some arguement will involve here... :lol:

Anyway, we are mature and "civilized" ... we should know what are we doing at anytime... right?

Well, I am not sure if anyone of you heard this phrase before: "The strongest enemy is ourselves". To support this statement, you may read the example below:

Example 1:
I am a Module Engineer of a certain machine in one company. My expertise can't be beaten by anyone, hence, I gain quite a good benefit from my company. One day, there is a problem happened to my machine and of course, I will be the first one who start the troubleshooting job. Unfortunately, I spend few hours or even few days, I still can't get it solved. One of the operator/technician tried to help me and so coincident, he knew the problem and immediately he resolved it. How?

Should the Module Engineer feel happy?

Three types of scenario:
A. The Module Engineer will say: "Ah... I told you that is the problem..."
B. The Module Engineer will compliment this technician but in front of his own manager/supervisor, he will "steal" all the credit and accomplishment without giving a single cent to the technician.
C. The Module Engineer will feel happy as someone helps him to resolve a problem that he can't get rid. He will recognize this technician to his supervisor and in the meantime, try to analyze what went wrong and why he can't find the root cause.

Let me tell you, common sense told us that, C is the appropriate behavior but HOW many people will act like this? This is not only applicable to employees only. I am talking about the attitude. I was having attitude A while I was in High School, after came out to work, I immediately forced to change to C. But a lot of my engineers/managers do like B, that is suck! But I just keep quiet and continue my job.

Example 2:
You are in a meeting with more than 20 person, sort-of like a weekly staff meeting... Suddenly your manager asks for some inputs to improve the weekly meeting to be more effective. Somoeone voices out a suggestion and you can see that you manager dislike/disagree with that particular suggestion. But to be fair for the whole group, he suggested that whoever agree/disagree, put up their hands. Eventually, majority support the suggestion. After that, you voice out that how can this suggestion makes benefit and so on... You manager scolds you like a monkey... treats no one around and only staring at you in the same time, accuses you for some negative behavior which you don't even think about, you try to fight but your manager fights back with some nonsense/bullshit and keeps accusing you, that arguement last for 20 minutes with no one in the room dare to say something to side you. How?

Again, there are three types of reaction:
A. You shout back your manager with bad words or cursing, then run out from the meeting room.
B. You keep quiet and act like nothing happened, everything just "swallow" in your stomach.
C. Keep quiet but after the meeting, voice out this issue to his manager. If his manager doesn't wish to get involve, go another level up, talk to his manager's manager and so on. If really can't resolve, then we go for option B.

Of course, we know that option C is the correct reaction you should have but normally people will go for option A or B. Some of them will straight away resign and so on... :cry:

Well, I used to tell people, when the first day you come for interview for a job, you have to expect these kind of "disaster" will happen to you. I am not sure how you guys think but for me, everyday when I come to work, I will leave my pride at home because no point I bring it together. If you want to survive in this world, you should always wear a mask wherever you go. No matter how people bully you, just smiling and make don't know. Maybe some of you will think that I am a bapoq or pondan, no balls and things like that. But no one ask you to bodek, just don't fight with people will do. This is what I meant in my phrase on top of this page. I am still learning how to do it... believe me?

I strongly believe, as long as we maintain our good attitude, someone will see it one day. Ignore those bastards who try to concentrate to improve yourself will do.

But... IIF (If and only If) someone really bully you until a certain extreme stage that you really can't "tahan" anymore, KNOCK HIM DOWN WITHOUT MERCY. This is good so that those irritating people dare not come near you anymore, but make sure you knock them down completely. If you know what is the meaning of my signature below in spanish, you will know what I am thinking... hahaha.... :lol:

This is my personal opinion and hopefully someone may say something to challenge me back. I am still learning...

~ roy ~

[iQing]

It's a really good discussion as it really enable us to see into ourselves...
it develops intrapersonal inteligence.

most people don't do so and they don't even understand what they feel or think, and that's unhealthy...

from what I've seen is...

I don't see much people live with love.

My neighbor locks her puppy dog in a tiny cage and let the dog bark whole day... she really lack compassion, never think how it feels, and she don't care if the dog barks whole day and disturb everyone else..

just an example...

people just live like zombie if they omit emotions....

[royston]

My neighbor locks her puppy dog in a tiny cage and let the dog bark whole day... she really lack compassion, never think how it feels, and she don't care if the dog barks whole day and disturb everyone else..

So iQing, tell me what do you think about the behavior of your neighbor? What will you do? How will you feel when you see that doggie is in suffer? Tell me more about your feeling, maybe we may discuss our own feeling...

~ roy ~

[laplace]

I have done something which I considered good and beneficial to an organization and I received the appreciation/agreement from the majority except one of the group member who gave sort of negative comments against what I have done.

To confess, the thing that I have done, I didn't do it in proper way, I never gone through proper procedures. No doubt, this is what I have done wrongly, and I would say that this is a terrible mistake. Luckily, everything gone smooth and I didn't put my company/organization into trouble.

What I have learnt was, I lack of "teamwork" spirit, well, this is what I can think of. Any comment from the Recom members? I am still new, so please teach me if possible.

laplace..