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Vaan
06-05-2008, 11:39 PM
For a couple of years I have been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from studying and working, earwax build up , poor blood clotting or anything else I could think of. But NOWWWWW!!! I have found out the real reason. I am tired because I am overworked.

Here's why!

The population of this country is 273 million.

140 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 19 million to do the work

2.8 million are in armed forces preoccupied with their own armies duties. Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.

Take from the total 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments. And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals. Leaving 1,212,000 people to do the work.

Now there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just, just two people to do the work. You and me.........

And there you are siting on your butt, at your chair, reading this. Nice, nice, real nice :mad

Legal / Logical

After failing his "Logistics and Organization" exam, a student confronted his professor.

"Sir, do you understand anything about this subject?"

"Of course, otherwise I would not be a professor!"

"Really? Then allow me to ask you one question. If you answer it correctly, I'll accept my failing grade and leave quietly, but if you don't know the answer, I want an 'A' on my exam."

"Okay, it's a deal. What's your question?"

"What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal, and neither logical nor legal?"

After long consideration, the professor conceded and changed the student's score to an "A."

Afterwards, the professor asked one of his best students the same question.

The good student answered immediately: "Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35-year-old woman which is legal but not logical; your wife has a 22-year-old lover which is logical but not legal - and the fact that you have given your wife's lover an 'A' when he should have failed is neither legal nor logical!"

Gabrielle90
06-05-2008, 11:47 PM
For a couple of years I have been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from studying and working, earwax build up , poor blood clotting or anything else I could think of. But NOWWWWW!!! I have found out the real reason. I am tired because I am overworked.

Here's why!

The population of this country is 273 million.

140 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 19 million to do the work

2.8 million are in armed forces preoccupied with their own armies duties. Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.

Take from the total 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments. And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals. Leaving 1,212,000 people to do the work.

Now there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just, just two people to do the work. You and me.........

And there you are siting on your butt, at your chair, reading this. Nice, nice, real nice :mad

you were sitting on your butt at your comfortable chair typing this... so the conclusion is nobody is doing the work... haha...

Vaan
06-05-2008, 11:49 PM
you were sitting on your butt at your comfortable chair typing this... so the conclusion is nobody is doing the work... haha...

Haha....lol you caught me. Good one. Actually that was the trick. You guessed it. Bravo!!!

Gabrielle90
07-05-2008, 12:00 AM
where u get that??? i like the legal and logical things... nice one...

Vaan
07-05-2008, 12:06 AM
where u get that??? i like the legal and logical things... nice one...

I got it from wocka jokes, but I must warn you, most of the jokes there are dirty but it's real nice and funny.

Iraka
07-05-2008, 02:37 AM
I like the second joke. The professor got pwned lol. XP

Thirdshifter
07-05-2008, 05:31 AM
The second joke makes no sense considering cheating and marrying someone young is both logic and legal.

Vaan
07-05-2008, 11:52 AM
St. Peter

A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission.
The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?"

"Phew, that one's easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic."

"Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass."

Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?"

The thief replied, "That's a tough, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through.

Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them

PS: Sincerely how can a thief even be allowed to the pearly gate when he is a thief?

Pigs!

Say the word pig before each word.

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Now say the word pig after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Next say the word pig before and after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Next say the word pig, pig before and after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Finally read the list of words from the bottom up.

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Have a Great day :)

Chrisntine
07-05-2008, 12:16 PM
St. Peter

A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission.
The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?"

"Phew, that one's easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic."

"Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass."

Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?"

The thief replied, "That's a tough, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through.

Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them

PS: Sincerely how can a thief even be allowed to the pearly gate when he is a thief?

Pigs!

Say the word pig before each word.

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Now say the word pig after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Next say the word pig before and after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Next say the word pig, pig before and after each word

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Finally read the list of words from the bottom up.

Pigs
About
Talking
Idiot
This
Got
I
Long
How
Look

Have a Great day :)


actually not understand. maybe my understanding skill is bad . duno how to read
1.Next say the word pig before and after each word
2.Next say the word pig, pig before and after each word
3.Now say the word pig after each word

Gabrielle90
07-05-2008, 12:39 PM
actually not understand. maybe my understanding skill is bad . duno how to read
1.Next say the word pig before and after each word
2.Next say the word pig, pig before and after each word
3.Now say the word pig after each word

nah... the point here is, u read the words from bottom... u will understand after u do so...

shakira
07-05-2008, 01:19 PM
'Look How Long I Got This Idiot talking About Pigs'.... that was a gud one... almost got me fooled. LOLX

Vaan
07-05-2008, 10:53 PM
An English teacher wrote this phrase on the board and asked her students to properly punctuate it:

"Woman without her man is nothing."

MEN WROTE: Woman, without her man, is nothing.

WOMEN WROTE: Woman! Without her, man is nothing.

So......Which one do you support?

Gabrielle90
08-05-2008, 07:59 AM
i support what women wrote... haha...