Love Bits...=P

[chillout]

Hmm... just thought about something while travelling to college today...

What would you do if the person whom you love doesn't love you?
a) Find someone else to love
b) Wait for the person to love you somehow

Or whatever answer ler... be as original and frank as possible... what would you do? how would you react to it all?

[CyberJaya]

Hmm... just thought about something while travelling to college today...

What would you do if the person whom you love doesn't love you?
a) Find someone else to love
b) Wait for the person to love you somehow

Or whatever answer ler... be as original and frank as possible... what would you do? how would you react to it all?

I think life is too short spending it with somebody who doesnt feel the same way you do. You should look for somebody else before it is too late.

[chillout]

hmmm... that makes a lot of sense

but let me create a harder scenario for you..

what if you try hard to look for someone else... and you do find someone who loves you... but you don't love this new someone... you still love the first one...

will you continue being with the new someone out of gratitude or something?

[naoj]

no. it would be outright mean to the one ure with..the mr/ms right now. i would just break up with the one i dun really like and figure myself out for a while...by either trying to get over the 1st one or by seeing what's cool abt teh 2nd one..WITHOUT actually dating either and causing heartache for me or the other person.

next? :) hahaha

[CyberJaya]

That new scenario is a tough one. I think you should probably toss a coin :D

[pandaboy]

Hmm... just thought about something while travelling to college today...

What would you do if the person whom you love doesn't love you?
a) Find someone else to love
b) Wait for the person to love you somehow

Or whatever answer ler... be as original and frank as possible... what would you do? how would you react to it all?

Hey...i think...this question does not have an answer. You guys know why? Cos i experience something before....and it has something to do with this question.

When i was in form 1, i fall in love with this girl. I dont know why I like her so much, I called her almost everyday, we talked about almost everything. Maybe you guys will think that form1 is the age where we start having crushes and puppy loves. But that is when I really love a girl. I ended up waited for her till form 5. That's around 4 years. In that 4 years, i got rejected by her 5 times, but our friendship remains. I always thought that she actually do loves me, but just not ready for it. But i was wrong...she doesnt love me.

In the end, i vowed to myself that everytime a girl rejects me, i will try my very best to forget her..and find someone new. I ended up falling in love with 4 girls in 2 years. Few months ago, the second girl i like asked me why I fall in love with the third girl so soon after she rejects me. And then, she told me that if i waited for her, and not giving up on her so easily.... she would have accepted me. So, i asked myself... what's my mistake? I waited for a girl for 4 years, and yet i didnt get her. I didnt wait, I moved on with life...and bcos of this, i cant be with the girl i love. So....wats the moral of the story? The moral is ...this is a stupid question. Life is so unexpected...no one can ever predict wat will happen. Hope you guys enjoy my story ^_^

[luke]

moral of the story: pandaboy is a player ... keep distance :P :P :P

[pandaboy]

moral of the story: pandaboy is a player ... keep distance :P :P :P

hey, dun spoilt my image ler..
im not...
i never had a gf until now ler...
there was once a girl like me...and i almost accepted her...
but..i realised that i cant forget the previous girl i like...so i told her ....
does this means im a player? if i am, i will just grab the girl that likes me...

sometimes it's really weird. the person u like, doesnt love u. the person that u dont like, loves u. What a world.

[gohweihan]

Hmm... just thought about something while travelling to college today...

What would you do if the person whom you love doesn't love you?
a) Find someone else to love
b) Wait for the person to love you somehow

Or whatever answer ler... be as original and frank as possible... what would you do? how would you react to it all?

hmmm... that makes a lot of sense

but let me create a harder scenario for you..

what if you try hard to look for someone else... and you do find someone who loves you... but you don't love this new someone... you still love the first one...

will you continue being with the new someone out of gratitude or something?

From the first scenario and the second scenario, it seems that the other person who loves you is facing the exact same problem.

[babygirl]

this is confusing.....
anyway, i think these happen in everyone's life...

[janewai]

Hmm... just thought about something while travelling to college today...

What would you do if the person whom you love doesn't love you?
a) Find someone else to love
b) Wait for the person to love you somehow

Or whatever answer ler... be as original and frank as possible... what would you do? how would you react to it all?

we can do nothing against it... :D
love... let it goes naturally itself... ^^
fate... we need to wait the it patiently.... :)

[chillout]

Perhaps it is easier said than done...

I enjoy watching Chinese series...

And on the television, you see all kinds of triangles of love...

A loves B... B loves C... but C is gay... lalala

You might say is UNREAL but I choose to believe that some of them do happen...cos' if not where do you think the script writers get the ideas...

[pandaboy]

Perhaps it is easier said than done...

I enjoy watching Chinese series...

And on the television, you see all kinds of triangles of love...

A loves B... B loves C... but C is gay... lalala

You might say is UNREAL but I choose to believe that some of them do happen...cos' if not where do you think the script writers get the ideas...

yeah, life is just so unpredictable. There's one case , my fren go after the girl, the girl rejected him, and the guy gave up, and only by that time, the girl fall in love with him.

[The_Observer]

"Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love."
-- Albert Einstein

[chillout]

haha.. so who's responsible?

[pandaboy]

haha.. so who's responsible?

Albert Einstein la...he wants to take the responsibility ma..haha
by the way, my lecturer told me bfore that einstein is a playboy....

[USSDefiantNX74205]

Good, bad, or just a girl?

I FELL in love with X in secondary school. It took me a long time to realise that as she was the first female who was ever close to me. I scored straight As in my PMR and SPM because of her ? we did group study and worked hard ? and were very close.

I am dark and not very good-looking. X is beautiful and we follow different religions. I never told her that I liked her because I had the feeling that she wouldn?t like me. But somehow, she found out and started to avoid me. I felt terrible as I had lost the only friend I was comfortable sharing secrets with. We did not speak to each other for a long time.

Then I came out with a plan to tell her that I had a girlfriend. It took awhile for that news to get to her. Once she knew, she started being friends again and we became closer than ever.

Now I am studying at a college in Sarawak and she has just completed National Service. I always send her SMS messages but she never replies. But she messages and calls our mutual guy friends. Should I just let go of everything and concentrate on my studies, or do I tell her that I like her? Is she good or bad, or are girls just like that?
Hormone Slave

Dear Hormone Slave
This is not about whether she is good, bad or just a girl. She is acting this way because she probably only likes you as a friend, nothing more.

But when your hormones are truly raging, you can be less than rational. Love can seem overwhelming and your feelings for her tend to keep your insides all tied up in knots and crosses. You don?t understand how she can be so cold and cruel to you when you have bared your heart and soul. You love her so much that you even lied to get close to her again, so why can?t she see how much you care?

Love can be so frustrating and lonely. You are afraid to tell her because you fear rejection, or losing her altogether. But silence gnaws at you as you really want her to know how your heart beats for her. It bugs you even more that she is close to your other guy friends, but not you.

The truth is hard to swallow, but you need to accept that the gal?s not for you. The moment she found out that you had feelings for her, she ran and avoided you. When news reached her that you had found a girlfriend, she was happy to be a friend again. It hurts, yes, but she is kind and sincere in being truthful.

Concentrate on your studies and work off those heated hormones. You can meet a few girls, date and have some fun without having to commit heart and soul. Fall in love with a girl who loves you too.

That was something I thought you might find interesting at http://www.thestar.com.my/news/archives/story.asp?ppath=\2004\6\13&file=/2004/6/13/features/8194435&sec=features

After reading this, I can't help but feel sorry for Hormone Slave, since I've been in a similar situation myself. If you were in his position, what would you do? Follow the counsellor's advice and forget all about her, or do you stick with the old formula of 'hard work pays off' and continue wooing her even though the odds of her falling for you are minimal?

[chillout]

what did you do since you said you were in a similar situation...

your words would be much trusted rather than a professional advisor who has not gone thru that particular situation...

but i guess each situation has its own unique solution

[pandaboy]

USSDefiant....

If for me, i personally will like to advice u to follow the counsellor's advice. What he/she said is very true. First of all, is it worth ur time and effort? And, have u heard of a phrase "The more you chase love, the more it eludes you". What is yours will sooner or later be urs. I dont know how girls think. Why she avoid the guy (Hormone Slave)? Why cant she be honest to him? Just tell him that she doesnt have feelings for him and just wanna be friends?
If the reason is because she doesnt wan to hurt him, then this is very wrong. In fact, the guy will feel more hurtful this way. I know it, cos I've experienced this before.

Are u really in this situation USSDefiant?

[chillout]

wah... why everyone in this discussion seems to be or have been in a similar situation... =P

hmm... i would like all you ppl to redefine the quote...
where by it says... if he/she was meant to be, it is meant to be...

you mean to say... the relationship will suddenly happen meh?

[CyberJaya]

Recently i met a girl at a student society whom i liked. I thought she was cute but she was from another background. Also i'm kind of talking with a girl at the moment although i'm not sure what the future is between us because even though we get on well there are some things that she did that piss me off. Also shes a bit on the short side. We dont look that right together. So i met this girl at the student society and we went out one time to eat and see a movie but strictly friends. We were sitting outside in the park and there was leaves or buds blowing in my hair and she picked them out. Do you think i missed something. Do you think she was coming on to me?

[Ic3b3rg]

haha.... munhua... u seem very expert on this topic wor... very experienced ha? love problems are very universal lor.... happens everyday every where to everybody.....hehe...... so don't worry... it is not the end of the world.... even though sometimes it feels like it is... if every one were to like the person who likes them at exactly the same time then there will not be so many heartbreaks....

erm... one thing is sure though..... before you want to love someones else or embark on a relationship, make sure you love yourself first...... don't wait for tht someone to bring you roses.... plant them yourself... that way your life will be full of joy and love and you can spread it to the ppl around you......

[chillout]

haha.. are you over cautious...

maybe she's just plain picking those stuff off your hair with no other intentions... =P

[chillout]

I must agree with munhua and iceberg..

indeed very priceless advice, eh?!

[USSDefiantNX74205]

Okay, to clarify things a little, I am not the person who wrote that letter in seeking advice...not that desperate yet, hehe. There are a few differences btw me and him. For one, the girl I fancy is from another town and I met her when she came over to my school for a competition. It was love at first sight, I tell you. But being young, naive and 16 at the time, I did not dare talk to her and ask her for her contact number and had to rely on someone to obtain them for me. But I knew from the start it was gonna be hard tackling a girl from so far away. Trouble is, even though I know how hopeless the situation was, I still kept my feelings for her, even till now. I tried liking other girls, but all of them were only temporary infatuations. In fact, my feeling for the girl was so strong that sometimes I felt guilty for liking other girls.

Now if you all want to know, the reaction of the girl when I told her my feelings was similar to Hormone Slave's girl. It was like all of a sudden she started distancing herself from me, picking out my flaws, etc. We used to be able to talk online very nicely, but after my confession, our chat sessions became more of an interview - I ask a question, she answers with one word. The writer asked a good question that I myself have been thinking about: is she (the girl I like) good or bad, or are girls just like that?

what did you do since you said you were in a similar situation...

I don't really know what to do. All this has been very confusing for me and like I said, I still like her even though I knew it was useless and the situation was quite hopeless. But for now at least I think I'm gonna concentrate on my studies first. No use worrying about a girl and having a bleak future right?

[chillout]

talking about love at first sight?

is that possible? I dun believe in loving someone by just seeing them... or at least it has never occured in my life...

reflecting on my past puppy loves, I usually dislike their first impression.. but once I know them more... that is when liking takes place... now... dunno.. cos' I dun wanna involve myself in this stuff, n concentrate on studies.. haha

btw.. can you keep liking someone you hardly talk to or see? like you were saying if that girl is avoiding you, how do you keep the feelings for her going?

[ElansarGelmir]

Wah, never realized that i have missed a lot of things going around here since i took a little break from Recom... Hmm.. got to have personal chats with u guys about ur issues... Hehe... Mr. PKM is here, watch out!

This guy could be the most ideal guy for me, but too bad, he's not interested. I like this girl, but she freaked out after i clean my breast. This guy likes me, but i can't forget my first crush. Hmm... all this sound very familiar and common, and yet no one is able to solve this prob...

my two cents. Don't rush. Take things slowly. If he/she's meant to be with you, then he/she will be with you. If he/she's not interested, no point keep bugging them, i guess (i dunno much about some gals lor... some of them like to tarik harga). This simple cliche is common but true. If you really love someone, you would rather see him/her happy with someone that he/she loves than seeing he/she unhappy being with you. But of course, most of us are selfish and because of that, it's always hard to let go of the ppl we love.

It's good for us to look at life at a more positive side. Cherish the ones around you more. If the person doesn't like you, move on. No point regretting. It's his/her lost not reciprocating your love. There are others who deserve your love more. And remember, be cheerful always. Don't let love problems rob away your youth. And, live life the fullest!

[USSDefiantNX74205]

btw.. can you keep liking someone you hardly talk to or see? like you were saying if that girl is avoiding you, how do you keep the feelings for her going?

hehe...love is a funny feeling isn't it? i don't know how i kept it going too...i used to think that love at first sight was impossible too. but my views have since changed...

[chillout]

haha.. this may not be a common cliche

but i think it's true... from what i've observed and watched on tv...

Loving someone who doesn't love you in return is the most hurting thing ever...

[kumitaa]

Loving someone who doesn't love you in return is the most hurting thing ever...

Is it really? I dun quite know which is worse,loving someone who does not luv u in return or there being mutual feelings but no chance at being together....

well,its true...luv is a complicated thing...i dun believe in luv at 1st sight n well, too often we only appreciate what we had when its gone....

as for would i give someone a chance although i dun quite have feelings for tht person?yup...i wouldnt lose anything....everyone deserves a chance....plus,you'd never know....u might actually fall in luv with tht person n get over d person u initially liked....

[chillout]

haha... but what if you don't?

and you take a long long time to realise you never will... you'll be wasting that poor fellow's time...

[ElansarGelmir]

I wonder who will be more practical when it comes to love? guys or girls? Or is it that love just blinds anybody?

[chillout]

I wonder too.............

[luke]

I wonder who will be more practical when it comes to love? guys or girls? Or is it that love just blinds anybody?
define "practical" :P

[jay86]

harlow..i would like to ask for ur opinion..
If u like ur good fren will u tell him/her ? He/she is ur classmate and both of u are good friends , ur friendship with him/her gets closer as both of u join the same society in school and usually works together to plan things out....will u confess to him/her ..or u will juz hide ur feeling becoz u do not want to take da risk of losing ur friendship when he/she rejects u?[/quote]

[USSDefiantNX74205]

I think you should just confess. Honesty is after all the best policy. If he/she rejects and shies away from you after that, then I guess you could judge whether or not you have a true friend in him/her.

[fish]

My friend confessed to me, I did not shy away....he was the one whom avoided me after that...not 1 but 2 guys, same case. Wonder why. I tried to be friendly but they 'just' can't take me as a normal friend anymore.

[Schye]

My friend confessed to me, I did not shy away....he was the one whom avoided me after that...not 1 but 2 guys, same case. Wonder why. I tried to be friendly but they 'just' can't take me as a normal friend anymore.

Well, to me i will confess for sure... cos i am one of those who really like to take risk in case of waiting. The result maybe dissapointing but at least i know about her feelings. If we can still be good friends then it will be nice but most of the time, we will try to avoid meeting for sometime to "cool down" and maybe will back to "normal" after recovering.

No one will know if you NEVER tell

[pandaboy]

My friend confessed to me, I did not shy away....he was the one whom avoided me after that...not 1 but 2 guys, same case. Wonder why. I tried to be friendly but they 'just' can't take me as a normal friend anymore.

Well, to me i will confess for sure... cos i am one of those who really like to take risk in case of waiting. The result maybe dissapointing but at least i know about her feelings. If we can still be good friends then it will be nice but most of the time, we will try to avoid meeting for sometime to "cool down" and maybe will back to "normal" after recovering.

No one will know if you NEVER tell


good one Schye, i did confessed to my good fren too...
we remained as fren after that.... but no longer than close anymore...
i guess things wont be the same anymore.... but hey, at least we tried rite? u wont wanna regret not telling him/her.....

[chillout]

hmmm... ever wonder why that happens?

Like why do we human tend to shy away after something like that occurs?

[pandaboy]

hmmm... ever wonder why that happens?

Like why do we human tend to shy away after something like that occurs?

i think it's not about being shy la...
like... for a girl who rejected the guy....if they remain as fren, the girl wouldnt want the guy to do so much for her....as she probably wants the guy to give up on her and dun waste so much effort for her. The guy will see it as a wrong signal that the girl doesnt wan to be his friend anymore. However, there is a lot of other reasons..and this depends on different individuals.

[chillout]

so if the guy avoids...
what reason would that be then?

[pandaboy]

Reasons vary... but like Schye said....


Well, to me i will confess for sure... cos i am one of those who really like to take risk in case of waiting. The result maybe dissapointing but at least i know about her feelings. If we can still be good friends then it will be nice but most of the time, we will try to avoid meeting for sometime to "cool down" and maybe will back to "normal" after recovering.


Maybe the guy needs time to overcome his sadness of being rejected lor... But i dun like this avoid thingy ...
As for me, i wont avoid a girl who rejected me...

[chillout]

haha.. i recall avoiding some person also...

when the person calls, i'll say i'm busy but tat wasn't due to a display of feelings tho... it's just understandable kind... and i guess it was getting scary... =P

[Ic3b3rg]

which is better....
1. pretend to be friends only with someone u really like and hurt deeply inside
or
2. avoid the person you like so tht you won't be reminded of how much u like tht person?

hehe... million dollar question... but no price for guessing....hehe...

oh... and for all ppl out there, rejoice!! love is all around.... share it......

[misled_youth]

Confession: misled_youth is in love. *sob sob. Rationality was thrown out the window 3 days ago. *sob sob.

Guys, take it from me. Don't fall for the love trap. *sob sob sob
________
Live Sex (http://livesexwebshows.com/)

[Ic3b3rg]

Confession: misled_youth is in love. *sob sob. Rationality was thrown out the window 3 days ago. *sob sob.

Guys, take it from me. Don't fall for the love trap. *sob sob sob

there...there.... dun cry lar.... :D .... u will gain more experienced and become more mature....ok?

[b_ronick]

which is better....
1. pretend to be friends only with someone u really like and hurt deeply inside
or
2. avoid the person you like so tht you won't be reminded of how much u like tht person?

hehe... million dollar question... but no price for guessing....hehe...

oh... and for all ppl out there, rejoice!! love is all around.... share it......


this is really a difficult situation..
i mean there isn't a definite answer to situations involving love...
each choice made results to different outcomes..
you may make the same decision for a similar situation but in the end the result turns out to be different..
who can tell even what is the meaning of love?

back to the situation...
you can always pretend to be frenz and then hurt until one day you get up and you feel so tired of feeling hurt pr that you realized that you are over that person..but do you think you would like to hurt that long?

avoid the person and forget? but ask yourself honestly do you think that you can really forget about that person..let's say you dun see this person for a certain period of time, perhaps a few years and then suddenly you meet that person again somewhere, there is the possibility that the feeling that you have tried so hard to deny resurfaces..now it is back to square one...

which is better of the two? i would not know..i think if a person that is faced with such a situation, it would really depend..if you ask me, i am not sure..i might take the first option but with a price of hurting myself...i wouldn't know really...

let me ask this question...
what is love?
is loving someone keeping that person beside you all the time and giving all you have to give including your heart to that person?
or is it letting that person go?

[USSDefiantNX74205]

I think I'm gonna introduce my own third option - confess!

[Ic3b3rg]

haha!!! i wonder why ppl use the word "confess" ?? cos it makes loving a person sound so wrong...ekeke.... hmm... i typed tht two options for the ppl who have ":confessed" and were rejected...hehe.. so, wrong interpretation here...

[USSDefiantNX74205]

Oops...wrong interpretation there. I'd go for the first option. C'mon, avoiding that person might make him/her feel you're holding a grudge or dislike for him/her for rejecting you.

[chillout]

I will second you..

but what if someone you can't stand is confessing to you..??

do you run?

i mean like the not avoiding thing is applicable to frens right...?

[ElansarGelmir]

It's best not to put on too much hopes and expectations... one most common love prob is ppl have too much hopes on others. They hope that he or she will return his/her love. She/he expects her to move on after break ups. That's why it's best not to pine too much for their love, coz in the end, the only one that will hurt is urself. Hehe... iceberg, how's the iceskating sweetheart of urs? LOL! no offense, k?

[lonewolfhan]

Haha... i think.. i will choose to become fren with the gal who i like and keep my feelings inside my heart.... kinda stupid huh ? hehe..

another situation:

the gal u like doesnt show any feeling to u..
but another gal who u doesnt like or even worse... u doesnt know much about her... CONFESS to u !

what will u do ??

[budakkerek]

maybe it's coz we feel kinda weird..like, why do you like ME...there's so many gurl/guy out there to like.

i feel that way sometimes...kinda scary when i know a guy likes me...even resort to doing some thing to make him not like me..and behave just like a normal guy friend.

hmm...which reminded me of sthing that happened a few weeks back..My friend introduced me to his friend, and we talked. And he kept ckp berpusing-pusing..made me pening..until lastly, his friend said, "dia nak ur ph number..but he segan nak mintak." so i was like..oh..oke...then i gv my ph number, to the friend who told me that this guy wants my number *imagine how he felt* to me, it's just a case of whether you got guts or not..tu jer

anywaym eventually he got my number..then he started calling me everyday..which kinda freaked me out..coz i dont hv any sorta mushy feelings towards him..So, one day he said he wanted to come by the kedai mkn which i frequent. so i was like..yeah..come la..not my shop what hehe..*like, mmg kerek laa the way i talked to him - coz i didnt want to encourage/lead him on.

so he said he's coming monday. i planned not to go on monday so not to see him..i went on sunday..then he came on SUNDAY! imagine my surprise..haha...i just said hi and continued melepaking w my friends...the guy sat w his friends...i just came by a few times to say hi n then went back to my friends

qbout a few days after that, the friend which introduced him to me, told me the guy said i xlyn him...and after the kedai incident, he nvr called me again.

Conclusion?
mission accomplished! :D

What i did might seem cruel to some ppl, but it's my way of dealing w things. i dunno why..but it's kinda scary when guys try so hard to get to know me...it's intimidating..and i dont like to be intimidated... :wink:

[ElansarGelmir]

Hmm... maybe u should tell him bright-bright (manglish, sheesh!) that u have no feeling or whatsoever for him. Maybe he misunderstood ur round-round conversation with him as trying to pull price.... Haha... better be clear with ppl so that they won't put too much hopes. and he won't go and makan at the kedai lar in the first place, and u won't get heart attack, and both of u will live happily separately mah. Hahaha, what crap am i talking about?

[budakkerek]

hehe..cant tell him bright bright dat i dont like him coz he nvr said he likes me or anything. but can see laa..coz he shy shy cat one...like dont want to talk..but still talk..hahah...

he seniri itchy want to go mkn there..it's a kedai anyway..so his own suke le nak mkn where..he knew i was gonna be there..that's why he came..but i was planning not to be there when he came...hihi..guess my plan xberjaya LOL
anyway, who asked him to..i didnt...

nvr mind la...that guy long gone..i wish him all the best....hihihi..

anyway, elansar, i had no intention to sell expensive or whatever. it's just that he talked berpusing pusing n i got fed up but it was kinda not nice to walk away n leave him hanging. but giving the number to his friend was my sorta msg to him saying, "you could hv just said it out loud n bright bright that i want your number". hahah..i cant help but laugh every time i remember the look on his face when i gv my number to his ph..hahah...

my q:
is it wrong to flirt if you hv no intention of being nothing more than juz friends w a guy? :wink:

[lonewolfhan]

Hmm.. but some gals... even though we have said "bright-bright" to them.. .they still sms and email u everyday... sigh.. what to do ? kill them ah ? hahahaa....

my own scary experience... i dun even know her so well... din talk with her more than 10 sentences for my whole life in secondary school... now.. she sms me everyday... even know my timetable in INTEC... who i go out with she oso knows... IF ONLY i know who is the spy she hired... im going to kill both of them.. HAHAHAHAHA!!!! hmm... sounds like a crazy person...

[PJKru]

She must be fat and ugly otherwise you wouldnt mind so much.

[chillout]

hey that's an insult to the fat ppl ler..
so mean... lah u..

[pandaboy]

Hmm.. but some gals... even though we have said "bright-bright" to them.. .they still sms and email u everyday... sigh.. what to do ? kill them ah ? hahahaa....

my own scary experience... i dun even know her so well... din talk with her more than 10 sentences for my whole life in secondary school... now.. she sms me everyday... even know my timetable in INTEC... who i go out with she oso knows... IF ONLY i know who is the spy she hired... im going to kill both of them.. HAHAHAHAHA!!!! hmm... sounds like a crazy person...

a stalker ?? wooo hooo!
i've got that experience too man....
but not going to share it here... pai seh ler... :oops:

[PJKru]

Sorry to all the fat people out there.

[chillout]

hahaha... shall I consider myself fat? and say apology accepted??

:P

love is complicated, ain't it?

[pandaboy]

hahaha... shall I consider myself fat? and say apology accepted??

:P

love is complicated, ain't it?

i've read an article about a PhD holder, majoring in love or dunno wat...bla bla bla...something related to love. She said, "i've studied love all my life, and yet i still dont understand what love really is." She's a divorcee.

Love is indeed complicated. And it's really very subjective. I think love is the only thing that we humans cant explain.

[chillout]

hmm.. i should perhaps major in love too...

that would be fun...

experimenting the 1001 kinds of reactions ppl have towards love...

[PJKru]

I think i was in love but i dont feel it so much now.

[chillout]

why so?

[PJKru]

Well i think that i've come to realise that maybe we're not entirely suited for each other. Personality wise shes perfect. Its just that she did something that bugs me from time to time. She didnt cheat or anything and its not that important. Also we dont look that right together. But for her tolerance and bubiliness, i dont think i can beat it.

[Kevinlim]

Love.....
I have asked this question many times, "what is love?"
Can we say that we are in love if we have a gf/bf? OR should I say we are seeking love through gf/bf? How do u know that u are in love? Is there any sign showing that u are in love? OR is there any special feeling u should have when u're in love with someone?

The question above is for myself. Now back to this topic.Been listening to many people bout this love subject. Many had started up a relationship and ended it. From what I see, starting a relationship at ages between 13-19 is not really working out here. I haven't see many successful relationship here at the 1st time. out of 10, I think 9 couples at this age will end up splitting(no offense, for those who are a couple now I wish u all the best. For thos who broke up, get on with your life, love is not everything :P ) So what does this shows? We are not really sure of our feelings here. I don't think we really know what love is yet. To have a crush on someone is easy but to love someone for lifetime is not easy. I think curiosity plays a big role here. Do we start a relationship juz becaouse we are curious to know how it feels?

FOrgot to quote, if i'm not mistaken, at the beginning of this forum, Pandaboy said that he waited for a gal for 4 years and got nothing out of it then later he moves on with his life and ended up falling in love with 4 gals in 2 years. If it were for me, I'll wait for 4 or maybe more years too. And falling in love with 4 gals in 2 years..... I don't think that's really love. It's more like a crush i think but if u really love them, I apologise bout my comment(no hard feelings ok? :) )

[chillout]

In my opinion, love usually does not last during the ages 13 to 19 simply because we are not stable at that time... we are growing and changing... we are experimenting our interests in life... if people do get together, after a while, they realized their differences... time and themselves have changed... adolescence a time of growing and settling down, ain't it?

[pandaboy]

FOrgot to quote, if i'm not mistaken, at the beginning of this forum, Pandaboy said that he waited for a gal for 4 years and got nothing out of it then later he moves on with his life and ended up falling in love with 4 gals in 2 years. If it were for me, I'll wait for 4 or maybe more years too. And falling in love with 4 gals in 2 years..... I don't think that's really love. It's more like a crush i think but if u really love them, I apologise bout my comment(no hard feelings ok? :) )

we dont even know what is love, so how can u say that its not really love between me and the 4 girls? one question, i asked myself... if the 4 girls...and the first girl that i like...all of them fall into the river,... who will i save first? i really cant asnwer that...cos they are all equally important to me....even though i like the first girl for more than 4 years...

so i rather jump into the river and drown with them...so my life wont full of regretness... lol. just kidding. this wont happen in my life. they all wont drop into the river at the same time. im just testing myself.

if u ask me to explain, i really dont know how, but i'm sure that is love that i've been gone through. not just a crush or someone that u can like a person today and forget about him the next day. i'm still trying to forget all the girls...till now.

[pandaboy]

In my opinion, love usually does not last during the ages 13 to 19 simply because we are not stable at that time... we are growing and changing... we are experimenting our interests in life... if people do get together, after a while, they realized their differences... time and themselves have changed... adolescence a time of growing and settling down, ain't it?

im 19 this year....lol..
so im out of the experimenting years next year...yahoo!
just kidding ...
i think that is just a generalisation.
again...it varies from one another.
i know a couple...an old couple...who are tuition mates when they were young...their relationship lasted till now... they are happily married couple now...

[chillout]

yeap.. yeap..
i've seen quite a few who last too...

my cousin married his f6 sweetheart..
they've dated for 8 yrs

but he said they did break off for a while

and this kind of really really long term relationship requires a lot of patience and effort...

dun everyone wish it to be theirs? but ...

[Kevinlim]

In my opinion, love usually does not last during the ages 13 to 19 simply because we are not stable at that time... we are growing and changing... we are experimenting our interests in life... if people do get together, after a while, they realized their differences... time and themselves have changed... adolescence a time of growing and settling down

I totally agree with this statement here.... but why do people still want to start a relationship? Why do people want to experiment with feelings? Feeling is something sensitive. Some can take it easy but some can't really handle it. Break ups are a serious matter and it really gives a big impact to both the guy n gal.

[SpRInG]

allow me to share some of my thoughts here.....

some people may think that love is about romance, how sweet and bla bla bla...

however, i have a slightly extended view about love. For me, love is not only about romance or things like that. Love is a choice. Love is a nature. We human beings are created with the capacity of love, in the image of our Creator.

Okay, coming back, i think that love is a choice. It's a choice for us to put down our own benefits, to care for the other person, to look after the other person, REGARDLESS of the condition of the other person, whether the other person is healthy, sick, rich, poor, beautiful, ugly, good, or bad. But if we are able to do that above all these criterias, then that is love.

More, love is about commitment. Love is not about being with a gorgeous lady or a macho guy. Love is about sharing what we have with the person we care for. Even more, love is about sacrificing ourselves for the other person.

It is said to be the most powerful force on earth, and i totally agree with this statement.

Plus, it is one the most wonderful things God has put on earth.

[Kevinlim]

i know a couple...an old couple...who are tuition mates when they were young...their relationship lasted till now... they are happily married couple now...

There are a few who can last this long. And how we wish that everyone ends up like them. Wouldn't it be beautiful? Many have tried-some failed, some was very successful. Urm... can i say that love is a game- there will be winners and losers? (winnners as in their relationship lasts forever and losers as in they failed):D Hope that there will be more winners in the future :mrgreen:

[SpRInG]

but i'm sorry but i can't agree with you that those who has not found the right person yet but who has been with the not-right one as losers. They are not losers. IT's just that they have not found the ONE yet

[USSDefiantNX74205]

Man, some of you folks just seem to have a hard time believing that true love can sometimes bloom during our teenage years. Why the pessimism? What Spring said about love is absolutely correct if you ask me. And nothing, not even age can stop you when you find it.

[FlwUa]

Talking about stalker, I feel stress!! So scary!
Guys out there, believe me, STOP if u know a gal doesn't like you! Please! Otherwise, you are agitating the gal's life! Do you want to agitate the life of the people you like?

Here comes my story...
I was away from hometown since april to further my study. I met this guy who was from singapore. He treated me so nice and I was so happy as I though I have met a really nice friend. Who knows... he had motif to treat me nice!

At first, he respected my privacy and just acted like a normal friend of mine. But then, he acted overbroad! I really think that he just acted like as if he was my boyfriend!! He would walk closer and closer to me when we, a group of friends were together and 'touch' me accidently! Always sat beside me when we, a group of friends had lunch or dinner together and 'touch' me accidently again!! He asked a lot of questions about me until so detailed!! He would ask who were the persons if he saw me greeted my friends. My god!! Who was him to walk so close with me??? Who was him to ask me so detailed questions??? WHO WAS HIM??? We have known each other for a short time only and who was him to do all of these???

I'm new to this place and all the things he did has made me feel very unsafe to be here! I feel stress and consequently homesick!

I'm really fed up then.... god... i even feel stress while typing all of this... can't continue anymore...

Think of what I'm trying to tell you guys!

[iQing]

Talking about stalker, I feel stress!! So scary!
Guys out there, believe me, STOP if u know a gal doesn't like you! Please! Otherwise, you are agitating the gal's life! Do you want to agitate the life of the people you like?

Here comes my story...
I was away from hometown since april to further my study. I met this guy who was from singapore. He treated me so nice and I was so happy as I though I have met a really nice friend. Who knows... he had motif to treat me nice!

At first, he respected my privacy and just acted like a normal friend of mine. But then, he acted overbroad! I really think that he just acted like as if he was my boyfriend!! He would walk closer and closer to me when we, a group of friends were together and 'touch' me accidently! Always sat beside me when we, a group of friends had lunch or dinner together and 'touch' me accidently again!! He asked a lot of questions about me until so detailed!! He would ask who were the persons if he saw me greeted my friends. My god!! Who was him to walk so close with me??? Who was him to ask me so detailed questions??? WHO WAS HIM??? We have known each other for a short time only and who was him to do all of these???

I'm new to this place and all the things he did has made me feel very unsafe to be here! I feel stress and consequently homesick!

I'm really fed up then.... god... i even feel stress while typing all of this... can't continue anymore...

Think of what I'm trying to tell you guys!


I have experience something scary as well..
there's a cun girl in my course whom I dunno her well...
at first she keep staring me but I don't mind...
she stares at me and I stare at her back via mirror reflection so she dunno I am staring at her also... hehe..
if I stare her back directly sure she will recoil..

but after many months she still stare at me.. like a zombie... I got worry. she never wanna talk to me or get near me.
after keep staring at me for a long time I feel harassed. is she having some sort of fantasy over me?
it's scary and harrassing...
luckily we r now not meeting each other...
I found out later that she's a bit insane one... hehe...
so guys do beware of such girl...

[USSDefiantNX74205]

FlwUa, maybe the guy saw something in you that isn't necessarily romantic. Maybe you look like his deceased sister or relative or something...and his feelings of care just took over. Either way, perhaps its best if you ask him what are his motives.

[PJKru]

" i found out later that shes a bit insane one " LOL
But anyway do i have any similar stories to tell about insane girls. Maybe, but not off the top of my head. IQing maybe shes been reading all of the sensitive posts you put on sig watpl. That kind of thing is bound to grab any girls attention. If a girl knows that you're as much a hearty man as your posts on Recom then boy, you'll girls queing up wanting to get to know you. I've never a girl like her though. You know these girls are really just a bit shy. Its nothing too much to worry about.

[iQing]

" i found out later that shes a bit insane one " LOL
But anyway do i have any similar stories to tell about insane girls. Maybe, but not off the top of my head. IQing maybe shes been reading all of the sensitive posts you put on sig watpl. That kind of thing is bound to grab any girls attention. If a girl knows that you're as much a hearty man as your posts on Recom then boy, you'll girls queing up wanting to get to know you. I've never a girl like her though. You know these girls are really just a bit shy. Its nothing too much to worry about.


hahaha... i take that as a compliment. welcome to the WATPL SIG.. hehe

actually staring is OK... I really feel comfortable when my first love stares at me when we first met..
but that insane girl stares at me like zombie... haha..
hv u heard of unclothing a person with eyes? i hv such a feelings from that insane girl... hahaha

[FlwUa]

FlwUa, maybe the guy saw something in you that isn't necessarily romantic. Maybe you look like his deceased sister or relative or something...and his feelings of care just took over. Either way, perhaps its best if you ask him what are his motives.

He admitted that he's trying to chase me in front of one of my friends. Asking me lots of questions is not enough for him, he also ask my friend lots of questions about me. He even asked her what I ate for my dinner!! Don't you think this is crazy?? I'm really fed up now and show obviously that I don't like him and try to avoid him. He sensed this but still, he never gave up in doing all these scary things!!

[FlwUa]

iQing:

In ur case, that gal is insane; in my case, that guy is insane!

really SCARY!!

[chenchow]

fluwa, why don't you just tell the person directly, "No!" (full stop). If you want to be more sadistic (if he really goes overboard), tick him off when he went overboard in front of your friends, or directly at him. He will feel terasa I think...

[ElansarGelmir]

" i found out later that shes a bit insane one " LOL
But anyway do i have any similar stories to tell about insane girls. Maybe, but not off the top of my head. IQing maybe shes been reading all of the sensitive posts you put on sig watpl. That kind of thing is bound to grab any girls attention. If a girl knows that you're as much a hearty man as your posts on Recom then boy, you'll girls queing up wanting to get to know you. I've never a girl like her though. You know these girls are really just a bit shy. Its nothing too much to worry about.


hahaha... i take that as a compliment. welcome to the WATPL SIG.. hehe

actually staring is OK... I really feel comfortable when my first love stares at me when we first met..
but that insane girl stares at me like zombie... haha..
hv u heard of unclothing a person with eyes? i hv such a feelings from that insane girl... hahaha

Haha... u are mentally raped!!! u are not a virgin anymore!!!

LOL! hey, dun perasan lar... maybe she just like the clothes u wear? Or maybe she like to see ur back? maybe it's amusing to her? maybe she isn't staring at u at all... just assuming that u are transparent.

[Ic3b3rg]

but i'm sorry but i can't agree with you that those who has not found the right person yet but who has been with the not-right one as losers. They are not losers. IT's just that they have not found the ONE yet

BINGO!!! just what i feel!! hmm... and for everyone out there.. if a relationship does not last, dun feel like it is the end of the world... remember the good times you have together... the sweet memories, and keep it in your heart.... falling in love with each other is one of the world's wonderful miracles.... and if the relationship is already dead... learn to let go, but never ever hate the other person... cos tht person has been your special someone for a certain time in your life.....

[ElansarGelmir]

FiWua, i think it's best to get ur friends to help u in ur ticking him off campaign... Hmmm.. better hang out more often with ur friends... For safety precautions... this kind of ppl arr, i believe they have thick face and high ego... they would do anything... Hmm... Dun be afraid to say NO... else, u will continue to suffer...

[Ic3b3rg]

hahaha.... right on, elansar!! tht is the best tactic ever..... tht is what friends are for.... works everytime... unless your friends start teasing you with him and try to get both of you together... then it will BACKFIRE BIG TIME!!!! so, get good friends and tell them that you are worried sick..... then pray for the best..... hmm... it would be better if you get guy friends who look tough...hehe.. then he might be scared...ahaha

[pandaboy]

FiWua, just tell the guy u r lesbian and ask him to give up.....
Wait a minute....is this a good idea?
There's a risk involved here u know?
Use it with ur own risk... :D

[FlwUa]

FiWua, i think it's best to get ur friends to help u in ur ticking him off campaign... Hmmm.. better hang out more often with ur friends... For safety precautions... this kind of ppl arr, i believe they have thick face and high ego... they would do anything... Hmm... Dun be afraid to say NO... else, u will continue to suffer...

We were in the same group during the orientation week, that was how we know each other. So UNLUCKY that we are in the same program, and in the same group for one of our projrcts! Well, nobody can be blamed besides myself, I trust people easily....

Hang out more often with friends? Haha... I believe this is a good way... but then... we have the mutual friends as I'm new here and most of my new friends are known from the orientation activities. Well, what I'm doing now is try to get more new friends (but... I admit that... I don't do well in my social life) and stay more in my room (this is the best way to avoid seeing him).

[FlwUa]

fluwa, why don't you just tell the person directly, "No!" (full stop). If you want to be more sadistic (if he really goes overboard), tick him off when he went overboard in front of your friends, or directly at him. He will feel terasa I think...

He never confess to me, how can I say "No!"? Just go and tell him,"I know you like me, but I don't like you."? What if he say "I never...." just because he doesn't want to "loss face"?

After knowing this scary guy, I understand why people always say singaporean is kiasu! No offence.... but this is what I have learnt form this guy....

[FlwUa]

hahaha.... right on, elansar!! tht is the best tactic ever..... tht is what friends are for.... works everytime... unless your friends start teasing you with him and try to get both of you together... then it will BACKFIRE BIG TIME!!!! so, get good friends and tell them that you are worried sick..... then pray for the best..... hmm... it would be better if you get guy friends who look tough...hehe.. then he might be scared...ahaha

YEAP! Our friends have started to tease us....
Tough guy? haha... what for he scares if I have a tough friend? I ever though of telling all of my friends that I have bf already, so that this guy will give up and my friends wouldn't continue to tease...

When I was still thinking whether this was a suitable tactic or not, I spontaneously avoided myself from this guy and expressed obviously how I didn't like him to appear in front of me! When he asked for lunch or what, I just answered that I was going to 'ta pao'...

Now, I think the situation has become better, he seldom appears in front of me already... but still, he continues to ask my friend things about me....

I will feel scared when I meet this guy. Even think of this guy only I will feel so unsafe and stress... hope that we won't be in the same class next semester!

Guys.... this is a good lesson for you.... learn from it.. :P
We still can be friend if he didn't act overbroad, but now.... *sign

Okay, I think better we stop about my story.. hehe.... someone feels bored reading my posts already maybe... sorry... :P

God bless me!

[chillout]

BINGO!!! just what i feel!! hmm... and for everyone out there.. if a relationship does not last, dun feel like it is the end of the world... remember the good times you have together... the sweet memories, and keep it in your heart.... falling in love with each other is one of the world's wonderful miracles.... and if the relationship is already dead... learn to let go, but never ever hate the other person... cos tht person has been your special someone for a certain time in your life.....

I think it is always easier said than done!

[pandaboy]

BINGO!!! just what i feel!! hmm... and for everyone out there.. if a relationship does not last, dun feel like it is the end of the world... remember the good times you have together... the sweet memories, and keep it in your heart.... falling in love with each other is one of the world's wonderful miracles.... and if the relationship is already dead... learn to let go, but never ever hate the other person... cos tht person has been your special someone for a certain time in your life.....

I think it is always easier said than done!

nothing is impossible....

[chillout]

didn't quite say it's not possible...

it takes a great deal of time and effort... i think...

[pandaboy]

didn't quite say it's not possible...

it takes a great deal of time and effort... i think...

yeah...of cos it takes a great deal of time and effort....
we have to learn how to let go .....
not like some ppl who commited suicide because of not being able to let go...


if we love a person, we dont have to own him/her. We dun have to have them as our bf or gf. We'll just hope for his/her happiness.

[chillout]

haha... is it really true?

can we really be happy seeing someone we love in the hands of another?

I think rejection in any form... is most dejecting...

[pandaboy]

haha... is it really true?

can we really be happy seeing someone we love in the hands of another?

I think rejection in any form... is most dejecting...

i can be true....if u really love that person lor...
would u want to see her sad being with u , or let her be happy being with someone else?

[chillout]

ok... maybe we would prefer them to be happy with someone else..

but you can't deny the pain.... we go thru?! ain't it?!

[pandaboy]

ok... maybe we would prefer them to be happy with someone else..

but you can't deny the pain.... we go thru?! ain't it?!

have u experienced this before? i did....and i feel much better....
rather than to kept forcing her...trying my best to snap her away from the guy... and make her sad.... even if in the end she's mine... i know i wont be happy.... i will feel even more painful...

maybe that is the power of love..

[chillout]

so u mean to say u r happy she's with the guy??

n it doesn't even hurt u one bit to c her?

i dun mean that u must have her... but won't u feel the ocassional paiN?

[pandaboy]

so u mean to say u r happy she's with the guy??

n it doesn't even hurt u one bit to c her?

i dun mean that u must have her... but won't u feel the ocassional paiN?

yes, im happy to see her so happy with that guy.....
the guy loves her so much, and she loves the guy so much....
of cos i felt terribly hurt at the beginning, but as time goes by.... the pain will slowly heal by itself...
i just dont know how to explain it.....
one day, u will understand it....

[budakkerek]

FlwUa, maybe the guy saw something in you that isn't necessarily romantic. Maybe you look like his deceased sister or relative or something...and his feelings of care just took over. Either way, perhaps its best if you ask him what are his motives.

hmm...deja vu..hehe..

there's this guy who works at this kedai mkn near my college (my friend's - i kinda help out+kj there)

anyway, at first, i noticed he slalu looked at me..not looked, more like stared at me w this smile on his face..i felt weird, thinking i might hv sthing on my face...mebbe nasik ke food, terlkt ms i mkn ke..hehe..

being me, of course i asked him..but he didnt say anything, just smiled and said nothing. freaked me out a bit. A few days after that, my friend told me.."he likes you, gurl.." In front of him! Argh!! i was like..."come on, man..dont joke bout stuff like this.."

then only the guy told me..."you look like my late sister. she died a few years ago. except for the specs, you look like her exactly. Esp your smile. that's why i like looking at you.."

so..after that..me oke sudah..no more weird feelings. Now, he even asks me to..tetiba jaa.." Tazzy, senyum sket?" then i would smile...just simply. coz i know it means a lot to him. :D

so ppl..any kemusykilan..just ask..coz without asking, you'll nvr know what the otehr person's feeling..right?

*the whole "i-look-like-a-deceased-person" still freaks me out. 8O

[ElansarGelmir]

FiwUa,
I think you should bring your friends together, go up to him, and tell him that you need some space on your own... Tell him that it's great being his friend, but tell him that you just want to stay friends. Hehe... thank him for his concern and care (annoying?), and say that you wish him to treat you like normal friends instead of someone closer or what... Hmmm... what do you think?

Coz for some ppl, if u are too cincai with them, and not able to stand firm and pass your message clearly to them, they will still misunderstand you and keep thinking that you are trying to jack up the price...

[ElansarGelmir]

so u mean to say u r happy she's with the guy??

n it doesn't even hurt u one bit to c her?

i dun mean that u must have her... but won't u feel the ocassional paiN?

Wait till you see her pain being with you... Har, then you will feel worse, and more serba salah...

[chillout]

hmm.. i guess....

still think love is such a complicated thing...

haha.. here i mean man n woman love ler...

other Love very easy to understand...or at least easier

John 3:16 For God so Love the world, he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but having everlasting life.

[iQing]

FlwUa, maybe the guy saw something in you that isn't necessarily romantic. Maybe you look like his deceased sister or relative or something...and his feelings of care just took over. Either way, perhaps its best if you ask him what are his motives.

hmm...deja vu..hehe..

there's this guy who works at this kedai mkn near my college (my friend's - i kinda help out+kj there)

anyway, at first, i noticed he slalu looked at me..not looked, more like stared at me w this smile on his face..i felt weird, thinking i might hv sthing on my face...mebbe nasik ke food, terlkt ms i mkn ke..hehe..

being me, of course i asked him..but he didnt say anything, just smiled and said nothing. freaked me out a bit. A few days after that, my friend told me.."he likes you, gurl.." In front of him! Argh!! i was like..."come on, man..dont joke bout stuff like this.."

then only the guy told me..."you look like my late sister. she died a few years ago. except for the specs, you look like her exactly. Esp your smile. that's why i like looking at you.."

so..after that..me oke sudah..no more weird feelings. Now, he even asks me to..tetiba jaa.." Tazzy, senyum sket?" then i would smile...just simply. coz i know it means a lot to him. :D

so ppl..any kemusykilan..just ask..coz without asking, you'll nvr know what the otehr person's feeling..right?

*the whole "i-look-like-a-deceased-person" still freaks me out. 8O



ehh? all the while i though u r a guy..
so u r a girl!!!

[pandaboy]

It's ok IQing. I thought budakkerek is a guy too when i first came to recom......hehe :oops:

But later, somehow I got to know that she is indeed a girl...

i guess budakkerek must be flamming in anger now ----> like this :evil: ???

[FlwUa]

FiwUa,
I think you should bring your friends together, go up to him, and tell him that you need some space on your own... Tell him that it's great being his friend, but tell him that you just want to stay friends. Hehe... thank him for his concern and care (annoying?), and say that you wish him to treat you like normal friends instead of someone closer or what... Hmmm... what do you think?

Coz for some ppl, if u are too cincai with them, and not able to stand firm and pass your message clearly to them, they will still misunderstand you and keep thinking that you are trying to jack up the price...

I though situation will become better and better when time passes by....

"..... Good luck for your test later!...." I received a sms from him ... my god, we weren't in the same classs for this subject and he always know when's my test!!! Once again, I felt so unsafe...

Well... maybe I really need to spread the news that I have bf already....

ElansarGelmir,thanks for your advice but I don't think it's a good idea to do so... but hey, you know how I feel! space, normal friends. annoying..... you said out what I wanted to say!!

[Kevinlim]

if we love a person, we dont have to own him/her. We dun have to have them as our bf or gf. We'll just hope for his/her happiness

I agree with what pandaboy had say here. y wanna force? we will be happy when our loved ones are happy

so u mean to say u r happy she's with the guy??

n it doesn't even hurt u one bit to c her?

i dun mean that u must have her... but won't u feel the ocassional paiN?

what chillout said here is true. of course we will feel "pain". but wouldn't it be better if only one person suffer rather than both of us suffer? if i were to choose, i would choose to see the person i love happy with another guy rather than keeping her beside me and making her sad.

[budakkerek]

hahaha...gotcha! same thing here, iQing..i thought you were a gurl (we talked bout this once, rmmbr?)

anyway, back to the topic, would u get involved w another person although you know that person already has a gf/bf?

[Kevinlim]

anyway, back to the topic, would u get involved w another person although you know that person already has a gf/bf?

u mean that person already started a relationship with another person? nope. actually it depends if that person u're interested in is happy with his/her relationship at the moment. if he/she is happy bout what they have now, then i think it's better to keep away so that no one is hurt this way. :D

[budakkerek]

what if although that person already has a gf/bf, still he/she wants to hv another? and the other is oke w it? i mean, the 3rd person laa. what do you think of this?

Just wanna know what u guys think :wink:

[budakkerek]

STALKER ALERT!

Guys, rmmbr the guy i told u guys bout? the one who i buat xlyn when he came to the kedai to see me?

*gasp!* he came by yesterday, then last night he SMSed me,"Tazzy i syg you.."

ARGH!!! *vomit...* 8O

hmm..what should i do? it seems like all my tactics are not working. i tried a new one yesterday - i bergaduh w him..menggatal sgt :?

[iQing]

hahaha...gotcha! same thing here, iQing..i thought you were a gurl (we talked bout this once, rmmbr?)

anyway, back to the topic, would u get involved w another person although you know that person already has a gf/bf?


since u r a girl can u please change ur confusing avatar???
why do u think I was a girl? haha...
do u know what is the meaning of "iQing" ?

[Kevinlim]

what if although that person already has a gf/bf, still he/she wants to hv another? and the other is oke w it? i mean, the 3rd person laa. what do you think of this?

do u mean wut we think if we were to be the 3rd person or as their fren?
if i'm the 3rd person don't think i'll get myself involved in this triangle relationship. obviously in the end there will be one person will suffer. and if there is someone that wants 2 partner at one time, i think this relationship will workout perfectly.

do u know what is the meaning of "iQing" ?
err... izzit in mandarin? does it means love? :P

[mdmd]

Personally, i think Love is the most complicated affairs i have ever faced. Regarding the issue of LDR (Long distance relationship), i strongly disagree with views that suggests it works, that is what i learned the hard way...which still hurts much till today.

Unfortunately for me, i am the one still 'grieving'...much to my despair, my ex is having a good time. Huccome girls are so cruel!

Last piece of advice, LDR is certainly no no if it is a 'across the pond thinggy'...err...i mean cross atlantic relationship simply because the lifestyle between two countries is so different. Would you be glad if you are working your a** off in one of US universities from the beginning of the semester while your gf is having a good time in bars or dance clubs in UK (until towards the end of the semester)?
Even flying across the pond to visit her during holidays could not salvage what is left.

As for me, i don't think i can stand watching another boy with my ex if i have been dumped for no strong reasons...just like Bush going to war...

[USSDefiantNX74205]

what if although that person already has a gf/bf, still he/she wants to hv another? and the other is oke w it? i mean, the 3rd person laa. what do you think of this?

Just wanna know what u guys think

You mean if a person already has a gf/bf and wants to have another and his/her current partner is ok with it? I dunno...personally I won't go near a girl like that. Its like...she's cheap.

*gasp!* he came by yesterday, then last night he SMSed me,"Tazzy i syg you.."

ARGH!!! *vomit...*

hmm..what should i do? it seems like all my tactics are not working. i tried a new one yesterday - i bergaduh w him..menggatal sgt

Well you could try suing him! :D

Well the guy is just confessing his feelings I guess. Can't blame him for that. Just tell him you're not interested...or maybe you should just take some time to get to know him (unless he is REALLY REALLY OBNOXIOUS). Who knows, you might actually like him!

And since we're also onto the topic of why budakkerek is a female (haha!) I have to admit that I too thought that she was a he at first. I think it was due to her nick and avatar. Most people tend to think of the word 'budak' in a male capacity I guess, even though it can be used for both sexes. That and her avatar has frodo on it. What does kerek mean anyway, if you don't mind me asking?

[pandaboy]

what if although that person already has a gf/bf, still he/she wants to hv another? and the other is oke w it? i mean, the 3rd person laa. what do you think of this?

Just wanna know what u guys think

Put it this way to make things simplier. A and B are couples. B like C. And C knows A and B together. But C doesnt mind, C is ok with it. What you guys think about it? I think this is what the question is, rite budakkerek?

I have a friend, there is this guy who sends flowers to her on her birthdays. This guy has been doing this for 2 years. He sent her favourite flower to her. The problem is, this girl already has a bf, and this guy knows it. And, this girl and this guy is not close at all, merely hi's and bye's during the 2 years when they were classmates and they didnt meet each other for 2 years already. But they still keep in touch through sms. Any comment?

[ElansarGelmir]

yeah, iQing and budakkerek's name and avatars (although iQing's avatar is a Neo guy) make us assumed that they are of the other sexes... Hahaha... is this what we call tian sheng yi dui (sepadan?).... LOL!

Fiwua, if he knows when u have tests and so on, just reply him, thank him, and ask how he know about it... then try to sound uneasy that people can actually know a lot about your life... you must try using the correct approach, if u dun want to just go in front of him and say NO! make him realize that you are not appreciating his "over-concern" that much, and tell him that this make u a little uncomfortable... u know, when ppl know so much about u and yet u didn't tell him... hehehe... whenever he does the things that you don't like, just tell him terang-terang you dun like his doing that. slowly, he will stop his irritating habit liao...

budakkerek, i think when u 2 bergaduh, it shows that you guys are sedang bercinta or married couple.... hahaha... i think so lar... from what i have observed from my friends, their gfs like to pretend to cari pasal, then gaduh with my friends so that they will make up with her... Sigh... wrong tactic lar!

[qedx]

well, if the people involved aer ok with it, who are we to judge?

[ElansarGelmir]

yeah, i agree... i mean, we shouldn't really kay poh with how many ppl should they date or what, as long as everyone's happy... why want to stir trouble? However, as what USSdefiant has said, i also won't go for this kind of girl...

[Kevinlim]

You mean if a person already has a gf/bf and wants to have another and his/her current partner is ok with it? I dunno...personally I won't go near a girl like that. Its like...she's cheap

agreed! why wanna get into a mess and complicated relationship with 3 unknowns? 2 unknowns is already complicated enough already. :P :oops:

[budakkerek]

Put it this way to make things simplier. A and B are couples. B like C. And C knows A and B together. But C doesnt mind, C is ok with it. What you guys think about it? I think this is what the question is, rite budakkerek?

Yep! right on...

Anyway, juz wanna know what you guys think. It's juz that recently, a friend of mine proposed sthing like this. His gf's studying in another Uni far far away *sounds like Shrek 2 LOL * and we've been quite good friends (me n the guy laa, i dont even know his gf).

personally, i feel guilty and a bit unfair to the gurl. So in the end, i told him, "sorry laa..i think better we stay as good friends. Being a couple also wont bring anything to me. i'd rather us be good friends like we are now."

It feels weird, like how come some ppl can think of such thing. Guys are better at this i guess, playing hooky and keeping "spare tyres". I can do that, no sweat, but it doesnt feel right. So better not.

Oh yaa..me n that guy? :?:

we're still friends. He's scared a bit now though, coz the gf's in town, back for hols. LOL..i'd lovee to go n see her, and 'pretend" that me n her boy are a couple and that i dunno she's the gf...hehe..wicked me! :twisted:

[ElansarGelmir]

haha... budakkerek, i think u've made the right decision... i can't really stand ppl who are not faithful... why dun u ask him will he mind if his gf has another bf in UK, but without telling?

[budakkerek]

hmmm..i thought qing ai means love?

Anyway...what's wrong w my avatar? you guys are not the only one who asked me to change my avatar or mistook me for a guy...it happened before. MANY, MANY TIMES! :D

Back in school, i even got love letters from a gurl of another school. she thought i was a boy (coz of my real name and nickname lorr - she knew me from the IRC lorr). one day, i replied n i told her,"sorry. i'm not interested in gurls." Rejected, she spread the story that i'm GAY!!! WT...
8O
ARGH!!!!

Why Mr. Frodo?
I like him - he's cute and he's such a strong-willed fella. I love his hair LOL :D

My nick?
My pet bro, 3 years older than me, called me that. I was 14 that time, and he nvr could win in his argument w me, although he's older n all.
Kerek means sthing like someone who has a "i dont gv a damn bout anything - i say n do what i want, and i can adjust to any kind of situations without fear of being labeled as a 'weirdo'" attitude.
i think it's the same meaning as the word "poyo".

In short, hv been using this nick for so so long that i dont really mind when ppl mistook me as a guy. being mistaken as a guy, well..it comes w the nick.
And yeah..one thing i realised is, when ppl think i'm a guy the way they treat me is different...more frank i guys...and yea, i kinda like dat... :wink:

Now, dont go changing the way you guys talk to me juz coz you know imma gurl aight? :wink:

[budakkerek]

i did ask him, "what if ur gf ade bf lain kat sn?"

he was like.."x, mn ade..i know laa.."

so i was like.." what if ade?"

then he mcm, "of course laa i xske.."

which gave me an opening to launch into my "that-is-why-you-should-be-faithful-to-ur-gf" lecture..hihih...succeeded in making him feel guilty.

maybe not much, but a bit is good enough. You cant change a person overnight as they say. But, at the end of our talk, he did say one thing to me, which made me feel like i succeeded a bit lor, getting thru to him, "You know, having you as a friend feels almost as good as it is having my gf w me. At least, when i hv u around, i dont need to look for another gurl (read: spare tyres laa)" which resulted in me launching into another "i-am-not-ur-gf-why-should-i-when-u-already-hv-one-but-i-will-and-can-be-ur-bestfriend-if-u-dont-go-looking-for-another-gf-and-be-faithful-to-ur-gf" lecture hihih...It was quite a conversation, i hv to admit.

Actually, why he wants another gurl, mostly coz he misses the talks w his gurl (though i think it's kinda lame huhuh) So, with me there..we can talk till the cows come home. So, it's sthing like a best friend kinda rship - a platonic one, no mushy mushy stuff. And i like it that way. i dont think i'll ever fall in love w him, coz i know he has a gurl, n i dont like being the 3rd wheel. But not sure bout his part. Well...let fate decide for us :wink:

ps: though the other day, he pretended to be my new bf when my x called. he was like,"Sayang...cepat laa..ape you ckp ph lm lm tu.." hihih..my x was so pissed..bit bad wasn't it? Can't help it..it WAS funny.. :lol:

[iQing]

hahaha...
budakkerek is a girl... haha

[USSDefiantNX74205]

So budakkerek, since you have so many admirers, have you accepted any of them?? Any bfs so far?

[tunsrilanang]

i had a boyfren who cheated on me, so what i did is, i cheated on him back.

ha.

[fish]

Tazzy, I am here as you asked to and read all your stories.

Panjang, lebar but if you really do not like him tell him a firm no.

Strange is the world, orang yang u xsuka, mengejar u dan org yg u suka sudah berpunya/x suka perempuan aka gay...hehe

Question: Why do studious guy always have a gf and vice versa? I think studious ppl are not bothered about these stuff and yet they always end up marrying first....most of the time

[fish]

i had a boyfren who cheated on me, so what i did is, i cheated on him back.

ha.

Sorry but I got to put in honestly that cheating is a very serious problems in a r/s.

[pandaboy]

Do u think it's a right thing to do?
If a person do something bad to u, u feel he's evil and bad....
But u did the same thing to him, aren't u as evil and as bad as him too?
It's just like a murderer...who kills a vivtim's mum. Then the victim's took revenge by killing the murderer's mum. In the end, the victim himself is a killer, a murderer.

We cant fight fire with fire, we can only fight fire with water. I dont know how to put it, but i hope u guys understand what i'm trying to say. Anyway, this is just my personal opinion.

Hey, i think i put up a situation few posts earlier...but no one seems to notice it... :cry:

[pandaboy]

Question: Why do studious guy always have a gf and vice versa? I think studious ppl are not bothered about these stuff and yet they always end up marrying first....most of the time

i dun agree.... who said so? i have many studious friends who still single....(not even have a gf bfore..)

[gal_flower]

i juz found tis thread...so here come my thoughts!

love is complicated (as everyone knows). so, generalizations are hard to make coz humans are all individually different. wad we perceive as love and wad another think is love can be completely opposite. of coz, bcoz of our emotional needs, we search for some sort of explanation to our love life esp when our love life is in bits and pieces (or maybe non-existent).

I, for one, agree wif kumitaa and chillout that love at first sight comes so rare that it's even rarer than a blue moon. And I believe that, even if you love someone from the first sight, it won't last. of coz, there are exceptions. Thus, my statement about not being able to generalize too much stands.

love that grows from friendship, i believe, are the loveliest of all. Y? coz both haf learn to accept each other's weaknesses and strength...etc...

puppy love, infatuations of coz are common...esp in our teens...but sometimes, we mistake these feelings for love. love, wad is it? i agree wif Spring abt love. you WANT to marry and take care of the other person for the rest of your life. tad's love.

i admit, i've never been in love though i had been in 3 relationships. love, is still out there. i do not agree that those who do not haf bf or gf are any less better than those who do. anyway, someone ask me 'y do all the jerks get the gals'. we r still young... it's time to enjoy our youth...

having someone by your side, to be wif you thru ur ups n downs, etc is simply great, i admit. but if u do not even haf special feelings for the other person, N if u feel guilty abt being wif the other person though u don feel anything special besides the special treatment, THINK TWICE.

[ElansarGelmir]

Hmm... I have a question for you guys to ponder. If you still haven't found your love one, not even if you are already almost 30, will you just anyhow marry with another fellow whom u dun really like? Or you are just goin to spend the rest of your life searching for the right one?

[pandaboy]

Hmm... I have a question for you guys to ponder. If you still haven't found your love one, not even if you are already almost 30, will you just anyhow marry with another fellow whom u dun really like? Or you are just goin to spend the rest of your life searching for the right one?

if u marry someone u dun like, u r going to spend ur whole life with that person
if u dun marry her, u r going to spend the rest of ur life searching the right one...
which one u prefer? hehe...

there are so many ppl in this world, definitely u'll be able to find the right one for u.... it's just the matter of time...but i wont think it'll take you whole life to search for one la..... unless u r ....workaholic... (dunno how it's spelt)...work till no time to socialise at all...

furthermore, with the advance of internet, many ppl seems to be able to find the right one for them via ICQ, MSN, AOL, Friendster, and other dating sites...


gal_flower, i couldnt agree more with what u've said in ur post... 8)

[SpRInG]

elansargelmir, so now it comes to the question on how would u define the 'right one' for you.

and another similar interesting question, how would u even noe if that person is the one for u or not, if you have not even tried? how would you know if that person is the right one for you, if you have no feeling at all towards that person?

[pandaboy]

furthermore, with the advance of internet, many ppl seems to be able to find the right one for them via ICQ, MSN, AOL, Friendster, and other dating sites...

reliable?? :?: :oops: :wink:

some of my friends got to know their bf's via ICQ. And they've been together for more than 2 years now. So are those realiable? :wink:

[ElansarGelmir]

elansargelmir, so now it comes to the question on how would u define the 'right one' for you.

and another similar interesting question, how would u even noe if that person is the one for u or not, if you have not even tried? how would you know if that person is the right one for you, if you have no feeling at all towards that person?

That's the prob. What if i haven't come across the girl whom i know i can wake up smiling and thank God that i've found her, and know that i can spend the rest of my life time happily with her around? Am i supposed to try my best to work out with those whom i dun think will suit me that well? Or should i just continue waiting, even though i might be old liao?

hmmm.... there are many girls out there, but there must be chemistry for love to happens. can't just simply choose one like buying things from market...

[chillout]

haha.. u guys seem so idealistic...

love isn't just about chemistry alone...
it maybe in the beginning... but after that it's a whole lot of commitment...

[pandaboy]

haha.. u guys seem so idealistic...

love isn't just about chemistry alone...
it maybe in the beginning... but after that it's a whole lot of commitment...


yeah la..actually we discuss so much here..doesnt mean that we will get to know more about love...
anyway, just let things be natural.... i think that is the best....
like....maybe our best friend will turned out to be the one for us... who knows? any thing can happen in this world... hehe... even enemies can turned out to be ur wife u know...

[chillout]

yeah..
the typical chinese drama..
always enemies become lovers...

haha.. so everyone, keep watch of ur enemies...hahaah...

[tikus_menari]

love is wasting time
better go flirt

girls are wasting time blockhead
onli think of romantic

[budakkerek]

well...fish-sensei, it's not like i havent said a thing to him bout me n him not gonna be together forever!
i hv tried letting him know..that i dont like him, by:
1. telling him I don?t like him
2. telling his friends that I don?t like the way he?s treating me (like I?m his confirmed gf or sthing)
3. openly showing my dislike for the way he?s treating me

Well..i dunno what's wrong w him but it seems like he's not getting it..mebbe his head is blocked or sthing LOL

So, now..what im doing it..just ignore n play stupid to whatever he says. I don?t msg him back, n when he calls, always say I?m busy etc.

Yeah..like u said, the guys i want, dont seem to want me..the ones i dont, seem to be wanting me (hihih...i sound so hot huh?) HELP!!

And to answer someone's question (sorry, i forgot who), no, i dont hv a bf now. just got out of a r/ship about 4 months ago. it feels kinda good, being single - can flirt w ppl - test market :D
_____________________________________________________
tikus_menari:
love is what makes the world goes around :)
and no, we gurls are not blockheads for wanting to be n get associated w love
Right, gurls?

Flirting is fun..i hv to admit. but only when it's done w knowledge of both parties that it's just flirting, no other meanings intended. Otherwise, it might bring other probs (i.e guy perasan, or gurl excited u like him/her LOL

:wink:

[iQing]

I believe in love at first sigh because I have experienced it myself.
To those who disbelieve in it .. it?s sad that u say that it doesn?t exist
just because you haven?t experienced it....
it does exist.

[Schye]

haha.. u guys seem so idealistic...

love isn't just about chemistry alone...
it maybe in the beginning... but after that it's a whole lot of commitment...


yeah la..actually we discuss so much here..doesnt mean that we will get to know more about love...
anyway, just let things be natural.... i think that is the best....
like....maybe our best friend will turned out to be the one for us... who knows? any thing can happen in this world... hehe... even enemies can turned out to be ur wife u know...

yeah, who knows...rite?
To me, If someone i dont like approach me, then i will just keep myself away from her for sometime and let her know CLEARLY that we are impossible. I mean no more contact, not receiving any presents, sms, letter etc. I think it will be better for both and in most of the cases, we may become friends again after sometime.

Just keep in mind that
You may avoid being loved by someone, but you cant stop others from loving you. So in this case, i make myself not worth to be loved to make her give up...
sounds cruel but it seems to be the best way to me.

Get that , Kerek?
or you need my help to call him and tell him that i am your bf??!? hahaha... and maybe i could warn him with some bs?

[tunsrilanang]

Do u think it's a right thing to do?
If a person do something bad to u, u feel he's evil and bad....
But u did the same thing to him, aren't u as evil and as bad as him too?
It's just like a murderer...who kills a vivtim's mum. Then the victim's took revenge by killing the murderer's mum. In the end, the victim himself is a killer, a murderer.

We cant fight fire with fire, we can only fight fire with water. I dont know how to put it, but i hope u guys understand what i'm trying to say. Anyway, this is just my personal opinion.

Hey, i think i put up a situation few posts earlier...but no one seems to notice it... :cry:

i think, if someone did something bad to you, and you do the same thing to that other person again, it is alrite, as long as you don't go overboard.

like murder, if the murderer killed one of your family members, you have the right to kill the murderer, not the mommy of the murderer etc.

but of course, forgiving is better than membalas balik (bukan membalas dendam, there's difference).

dalam dunia ni, berapa banyak yang mampu memaafkan dan melupakan kesalahan org terhadap diri anda dan boleh lagi berbaik baik dengan orang yg berbuat tak baik kepada diri anda?
i know i am still learning to forgive ppl , it's hard, it's never easy, at least for me.

[pandaboy]

i think, if someone did something bad to you, and you do the same thing to that other person again, it is alrite, as long as you don't go overboard.

like murder, if the murderer killed one of your family members, you have the right to kill the murderer, not the mommy of the murderer etc.

but of course, forgiving is better than membalas balik (bukan membalas dendam, there's difference).

dalam dunia ni, berapa banyak yang mampu memaafkan dan melupakan kesalahan org terhadap diri anda dan boleh lagi berbaik baik dengan orang yg berbuat tak baik kepada diri anda?
i know i am still learning to forgive ppl , it's hard, it's never easy, at least for me.

yeah...its hard to forgive and forget sometimes.....
what im trying to say is....

lets say for example..the murderer who kill one of ur family members. if u kill him in revenge, u will ended up getting death sentence from the court....or u have to stay in the prison for ur whole life. When u think about it, is it worth it? In the end, u r the one who suffers....that's my opinion la.

i didnt ask u to forgive ppl easily, as i m not someone who can forgive and forget easily too..... just that.... dun repeat what bad things someone has done to us. It's not worthwhile.

Just my 2 cents...no bad feelings ok...everyone?

[Kevinlim]

Do u think it's a right thing to do?
If a person do something bad to u, u feel he's evil and bad....
But u did the same thing to him, aren't u as evil and as bad as him too?
It's just like a murderer...who kills a victim's mum. Then the victim's took revenge by killing the murderer's mum. In the end, the victim himself is a killer, a murderer.

We cant fight fire with fire, we can only fight fire with water. I dont know how to put it, but i hope u guys understand what i'm trying to say. Anyway, this is just my personal opinion

I totally agree with u pandaboy. When will it end if we keep on revenging on others. Some say "bring it on, I can return what u had done to me" but do you guys think this is correct? Let's say one guy hits u, then u hit him back and he hits u back again... so are they going to be hitting each other until the end of their life? If that's so i think they'll end up being a good friend :P Heh heh, actually what I'm trying to say here is, why can't we just forgive people? People say forgive an forget but i think the "forget" part is not really necessary. U can always remember what he/she had done to you and don't fall into it for the second time.

Hmm... I have a question for you guys to ponder. If you still haven't found your love one, not even if you are already almost 30, will you just anyhow marry with another fellow whom u dun really like? Or you are just goin to spend the rest of your life searching for the right one?

Stay single and search for the right one. Marrying one that u don't love will have both of u suffer and most probably end up divorcing and then ur kids will suffer.

[b_ronick]

[quote="Kevinlim"] Heh heh, actually what I'm trying to say here is, why can't we just forgive people? People say forgive an forget but i think the "forget" part is not really necessary. U can always remember what he/she had done to you and don't fall into it for the second time.

[/qoute]

if someone did something really horrible to you..not just like erm...did something tiny mistake..can you really forgive that person? forgive for what they have done?
don't get me wrong here..i mean forgiving is something that would be really great if you can do it but trust me forgivin is not all that simple..it is not at all...
forgiving means that you can fully get over the pain that person have caused you...can you really bring yourself to forgive someone who have did something that is so so wrong towards you? something that is difficult for you to forgive?
but here i mean not forgivin doesn't mean you will take revenge or somewhat to that extend... just the inability to get over the pain caused

[ElansarGelmir]

Haha... are we living in the world of Chinese Drama? i hope not... They always have the same predictable plots...

anyway, can i have another question? Hmm... who's now ready for a relationship?

[Kevinlim]

anyway, can i have another question? Hmm... who's now ready for a relationship?

why elansargelmir? are u looking for your partner? :oops: heh heh heh

[USSDefiantNX74205]

if someone did something really horrible to you..not just like erm...did something tiny mistake..can you really forgive that person? forgive for what they have done?
don't get me wrong here..i mean forgiving is something that would be really great if you can do it but trust me forgivin is not all that simple..it is not at all...
forgiving means that you can fully get over the pain that person have caused you...can you really bring yourself to forgive someone who have did something that is so so wrong towards you? something that is difficult for you to forgive?
but here i mean not forgivin doesn't mean you will take revenge or somewhat to that extend... just the inability to get over the pain caused

This sums up what I feel. I think I've said it before and I'll say it again. Though forgiveness may sound ideal, its actually extremely hard to do. From the point of view of a person who has never been extremely wronged, he/she would of course preach forgiveness, etc. But ask those who have been really betrayed or have had their lives virtually destroyed due to another person or persons. Would he/she be able to forgive then? It won't be that simple I assure you. You may forgive that person, but like b_ronick said, the inability to get over the pain caused is what makes it hurts so much. Just like chemistry, there are lotsa deviations from the 'ideal' forgive and forget situation.

anyway, can i have another question? Hmm... who's now ready for a relationship?

Me!! Me!! That is, if you can make my crush magically fall in love with me...

[gatecrasher]

I believe in love at first sigh because I have experienced it myself.

Love at first sigh?? :wink: :wink:
Ahem... get what i'm trying to say?
You mean love at first sight! Careful with your typing...don't play-play!

[iQing]

ohhhg. thanx for your correction...

love at first sight is ... romantic.. just like magic..

[kucingbiru]

back to "forgive and forget" subject.

i think we need to differentiate "forgive" and "revenge" here. you might not forgive someone, but that doesn't mean you have take vengeance against him/her. but taking vengeance is a sure sign that you dont forgive that someone.

just like pandaboy says, a revenge doesn't make you better than that someone. in fact, with sufficient revenge, you might even be worse. that's just my opinion.

*that someone refers to whoever hurts first

[iQing]

back to "forgive and forget" subject.

i think we need to differentiate "forgive" and "revenge" here. you might not forgive someone, but that doesn't mean you have take vengeance against him/her. but taking vengeance is a sure sign that you dont forgive that someone.

just like pandaboy says, a revenge doesn't make you better than that someone. in fact, with sufficient revenge, you might even be worse. that's just my opinion.

*that someone refers to whoever hurts first


a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

[USSDefiantNX74205]

a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

You have to understand why most people choose the 'negative' part. Just telling them to forgive and forget is no use. For them, there is simply no compensation for injustices they have faced, and thus they ask: why forgive? Don't just go around thinking or telling everyone that they should forgive and forget. Things just aren't as ideal as that. Explain it to them...

love at first sight is ... romantic.. just like magic..

Ooh...guess I'm not as alone as I think, eh? So iQing, are you still in love with this special someone?

[iQing]

a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

You have to understand why most people choose the 'negative' part. Just telling them to forgive and forget is no use. For them, there is simply no compensation for injustices they have faced, and thus they ask: why forgive? Don't just go around thinking or telling everyone that they should forgive and forget. Things just aren't as ideal as that. Explain it to them...

love at first sight is ... romantic.. just like magic..

Ooh...guess I'm not as alone as I think, eh? So iQing, are you still in love with this special someone?



luckily there?s an example of forgiveness.. let?s look to the history:

the muslim chopped of the original bo tree where buddha gain his enlightenment...

the buddhist forgive the muslims..

in afghanistan the talibans bomb the statue of buddha away... did the buddhist fight back?

after months karma works.. the taliban was blasted back by the US

so if the buddhist can choose peace.. we can too right?



-----

i am very click with my first love but we are not keeping in touch... she?s busy..
sha says she negl?ets me so that I can be happy and successful in life
i just can?t understand...

[chillout]

a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

You have to understand why most people choose the 'negative' part. Just telling them to forgive and forget is no use. For them, there is simply no compensation for injustices they have faced, and thus they ask: why forgive? Don't just go around thinking or telling everyone that they should forgive and forget. Things just aren't as ideal as that. Explain it to them...


Nevertheless, I think it is possible... I've been wronged many a times, been betrayed by friends who mean a lot to me... I will get so hurt and upset... sometimes, I wish to take revenge... but my saner mind says FORGIVE... I believe I have forgiven lots of people... but I can't deny that it is never forgotten... The pain and hurt haunt me quite often... but I tell myself... it is over and gone... why keep the hatred? The one who hurts more eventually is ME! So learn to let go... and you'll be a happier person...

[USSDefiantNX74205]

Teach me then, o wise ones... :roll:

Sorry if I sound almost insulting there, but like I said, it isn't that easy. My experiences told me so. Forgive them and they come back to you in more devastating ways because they think you are too afraid to retaliate. Tell me why and how I should forgive.

[iQing]

try and read the article of awareness in another thread..
i hope it helps..

I have been tolerating with difficult people in life..
it?s something u must learn and experience...

it?s too easy for a person to succumb to thier lunar side of psyche...

if u choose hatred.. love wont boom..

if the seed don?t die, the plant wont grow.. so die to ur hatred. it?s ur choice in hand

[chillout]

in church today, my pastor did mention something about forgiveness...

the unforgiving one is the one that loses out irrespective of how hurt he/she has been due to the actions of irresponsible people. the heart of the unforgiving will become hardened and contain lots of bitterness.... think about it? ain't you at the losing end?

no one said it was easy but once you have forgiven... you feel at peace... for those who are Christians, all I can say is ask God to guide and help. He is mighty and can do all things...

Non christians... just convince yourself that you have to forgive the person.... no matter what...

and whenever the hurtful stuff surfaces.... just do the same thing again... it's a process... till you have forgiven completely...
something like meditating... just doing it over n over again...

i hope this has enlightened you in some way

[ElansarGelmir]

I'm actually trying to make a survey, but sigh (love at first sigh? too bad, i've sighed too many times... ok, digressed), not many ppl answered my questions....

I'm trying to see how many ppl prefer let things go the way it should or how many ppl are ready and on the look and jump on every opportunity they see in relationships.... simple. Hehehe...

[ElansarGelmir]

Teach me then, o wise ones... :roll:

Sorry if I sound almost insulting there, but like I said, it isn't that easy. My experiences told me so. Forgive them and they come back to you in more devastating ways because they think you are too afraid to retaliate. Tell me why and how I should forgive.

USSdefiant, i think u have the right to choose either to forgive or to take vengence... however, do think which way will make u feel better? Revenge? How long have you been holding the grudges and planning on a revenge on those ppl? How long? what if the opportunity never comes? will u still hold ur grudges, and feel uncomfortable angry if those ppl are happy? Well, we feel that most of the time when we despise someone. We wish that waves and waves of adversities will pour upon them, but when they are happy, how do you feel? More angry? Damn angry?

Perhaps my forgetfulness helps, that's why i always forget why i am angry at this person, so my anger usually dun last long... (auto-forgive? hehe, i dunno, but ppl, DUN use my weakness against me arr!!!). However, i always say the Lord's Prayer, and i think it helps in pacifying my ire... The verse is "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sins against us." I like this verse a lot...

And oh yeah,if u want to learn how to forgive, maybe u can do like what i do... learn to forget first... be happy always... try to think about the fun things u will be doing, or plan to do later of the day/week/month.... keep urself occupied with those happy thoughts... then maybe u will forget... and forgive, perhaps. :wink:

[chiunlin]

I'm actually trying to make a survey, but sigh (love at first sigh? too bad, i've sighed too many times... ok, digressed), not many ppl answered my questions....

I'm trying to see how many ppl prefer let things go the way it should or how many ppl are ready and on the look and jump on every opportunity they see in relationships.... simple. Hehehe...

I believe in love at first sight but I also believe that love is a natural progression from friendship. For me, I will let things go the way it should.

[ElansarGelmir]

Good... so there's one guy who is ready and looking for his pardnar and there's this guy who thinks that it's better for him to let things go the way it should... haha... there's a draw. anyone else? Hmmm... girls?

[Kevinlim]

a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

thinking negatively is what humans are good at if not how are we going to be this competitive :P but i still think forgiving or not revenging is the better choice. maybe i haven't been really betrayed or got into real deep shit with others, i don't really know how bad it feels but from what I see, it sure felt very very very bad for USSDefiant.....

to forgive or not to forgive depends on individuals it's up to them to decide.

Perhaps my forgetfulness helps, that's why i always forget why i am angry at this person, so my anger usually dun last long...

And oh yeah,if u want to learn how to forgive, maybe u can do like what i do... learn to forget first... be happy always... try to think about the fun things u will be doing, or plan to do later of the day/week/month.... keep urself occupied with those happy thoughts... then maybe u will forget... and forgive, perhaps.

haha, same here. why wanna keep those nasty feelings in you? U'll be the one that suffer more to keep all the grudges. Let things be. Keep the good memories and lighten up yourself. :P

[Ic3b3rg]

I'm actually trying to make a survey, but sigh (love at first sigh? too bad, i've sighed too many times... ok, digressed), not many ppl answered my questions....

I'm trying to see how many ppl prefer let things go the way it should or how many ppl are ready and on the look and jump on every opportunity they see in relationships.... simple. Hehehe...

God has a plan for all of us, so do not worry about your future relationships or your current ones, just be thankful for what you have now. I would let things take its course (wrong grammar !! please correct me) simply because i have seen too many ppl suffering from love relationships! I do not want to jump into relationships because i have seen too many heartbreaks and too many friendships broken between my friends because of love. And yet i believe that some people are destined for love, and it is not wrong to love and hurt because it is life's greatest gifts. So, if there is someone whom i love, i would just enjoy the times we have together, whether as friends or otherwise, because every moment you spend with the person that you love is sweet and joyful.... remember to thank God for it....

[b_ronick]

a person have the choice of choosing hatred or compassion
sad that many people choose the negative part.

ahhh...as many peeps have said before me...it isnt simple at all to forgive a person and thus results the person in choosing the negative option...do you think that peeps wouldn't like to forgive others? believe me they do think about forgivin others but it takes a tremendously huge effort to do..not impossible but a definitely difficult task to do...just imagine someone has hurt you tremendously...causes a big big scar in you..something that you will never forget..do you think you can forgive the person? maybe you may think that you have forgiven the person, you remain friends with the person..but do you put the same trust in that person..if your answer is no then it is simply that you have not forgiven that person altho you think you have..

[gatecrasher]

God has a plan for all of us, so do not worry about your future relationships or your current ones, just be thankful for what you have now.
You have so much trust in fate?
Besides, just because something is your fate, it doesn't mean you'll like it. Isn't that something to worry about? That is, if you believe you can change ur fate, which i do.

[iQing]

I have done a researh last time...

malas to write it here..

from my research those couples who are compatible have similar eyes..
those who are not compatible don?t have similar eyes
just observe and see whether my words are true or not...

[digimushu]

ahhh...as many peeps have said before me...it isnt simple at all to forgive a person and thus results the person in choosing the negative option...do you think that peeps wouldn't like to forgive others? believe me they do think about forgivin others but it takes a tremendously huge effort to do..not impossible but a definitely difficult task to do...just imagine someone has hurt you tremendously...causes a big big scar in you..something that you will never forget..do you think you can forgive the person? maybe you may think that you have forgiven the person, you remain friends with the person..but do you put the same trust in that person..if your answer is no then it is simply that you have not forgiven that person altho you think you have..


Once bitten, twice shy...

[iQing]

what do u think of love in the game Joe Millionaire ?
it seems kinda real + happy ending...

[kucingbiru]

not really a happy ending. they broke up not long after the end of the show.

[iQing]

can?t find it in the internet.. do u have any links?
what happened to them?

[kucingbiru]

http://www.realitytvworld.com/index/articles/story.php?s=1049

i love that girl. she looks sweet, modest. hmm. do you think she'll come after me on BlueCat Billionaire show or something? :P

[Kevinlim]

God has a plan for all of us, so do not worry about your future relationships or your current ones, just be thankful for what you have now. I would let things take its course (wrong grammar !! please correct me) simply because i have seen too many ppl suffering from love relationships! I do not want to jump into relationships because i have seen too many heartbreaks and too many friendships broken between my friends because of love. And yet i believe that some people are destined for love, and it is not wrong to love and hurt because it is life's greatest gifts. So, if there is someone whom i love, i would just enjoy the times we have together, whether as friends or otherwise, because every moment you spend with the person that you love is sweet and joyful.... remember to thank God for it....

I totally agree with you. I've seen many hearbrokens and I had heard from many that had their heart broken. I can see that they are really feeling bad for themself and their ex-partner. Don't jump into relationships unless you are really sure of what(or who) you want coz if not handled properly, things can go real wrong.

[fish]

well...fish-sensei, it's not like i havent said a thing to him bout me n him not gonna be together forever!
i hv tried letting him know..that i dont like him, by:
1. telling him I don?t like him
2. telling his friends that I don?t like the way he?s treating me (like I?m his confirmed gf or sthing)
3. openly showing my dislike for the way he?s treating me

Well..i dunno what's wrong w him but it seems like he's not getting it..mebbe his head is blocked or sthing LOL

So, now..what im doing it..just ignore n play stupid to whatever he says. I don?t msg him back, n when he calls, always say I?m busy etc.

Yeah..like u said, the guys i want, dont seem to want me..the ones i dont, seem to be wanting me (hihih...i sound so hot huh?) HELP!!

And to answer someone's question (sorry, i forgot who), no, i dont hv a bf now. just got out of a r/ship about 4 months ago. it feels kinda good, being single - can flirt w ppl - test market :D
_____________________________________________________
tikus_menari:
love is what makes the world goes around :)
and no, we gurls are not blockheads for wanting to be n get associated w love
Right, gurls?

Flirting is fun..i hv to admit. but only when it's done w knowledge of both parties that it's just flirting, no other meanings intended. Otherwise, it might bring other probs (i.e guy perasan, or gurl excited u like him/her LOL

:wink:

Kahsian le Kerrek. I think that you may have done everything you could, it's just that the poor guy doesn't want to give up on you cause he thinks VERY highly of you.

Ah single.....I sort of like it too but not the loneliness part. Plus like you mentioned, I can flirt as I like, but must be careful le...the last time I flirted with a Korean guy....aiay, no I do not think I want to elaborate on the details...hihi

[fish]

Just keep in mind that
You may avoid being loved by someone, but you cant stop others from loving you. So in this case, i make myself not worth to be loved to make her give up...
sounds cruel but it seems to be the best way to me.

Get that , Kerek?
or you need my help to call him and tell him that i am your bf??!? hahaha... and maybe i could warn him with some bs?

Why SengChye? Trying to act like big brother ah? Heheh, you can give it a try though, Kerrek can say like, my BF is in Japan...I miss him everyday.....OUCH, but the bad part is Kerrek cannot flirt after this, haram cause she is 'attached' already. :D

[budakkerek]

Schye,serious you can do that?

haha...just for the fun of it, you can try n call him, and mrh him in Malay..then talk Chinese a bit...Jap a bit..haha..mesti he thought Tazzy's 'bf' is a taiko plus member Yakuza ==>will no longer bug me!! ^-^

hehe...arigato, Nissang! but it's oke now..coz he no longer calls/msg me...i guess he sudah got the msg kot :p

Fish-sensei, cerita laa...why dont want to share? it's gonna be interesting... :D

stimes you do get lonely. But hey...that comes w being single i guess :wink:

[fish]

Hey, glad to know that you had a much more 'normal' life now. i mean without his bugging. Do you miss having an admirer like him around? Doesn't it make you happy at times to think that you are liked and admired by others?

Anyway, my cerita is tak senonoh. The Korean guy invited to meet me at midnight in pyjamas and I think that he must be crazy....very international here. Aiyah, I do not want to name their nationalities but all the 'chasers' are not Malaysians and not Japanese.

[digimushu]

...The Korean guy invited to meet me at midnight in pyjamas ...


Wow, i did not realize the demand for Malaysian products was that good.... :P

[ElansarGelmir]

Hey, glad to know that you had a much more 'normal' life now. i mean without his bugging. Do you miss having an admirer like him around? Doesn't it make you happy at times to think that you are liked and admired by others?

Anyway, my cerita is tak senonoh. The Korean guy invited to meet me at midnight in pyjamas and I think that he must be crazy....very international here. Aiyah, I do not want to name their nationalities but all the 'chasers' are not Malaysians and not Japanese.

does that guy has some kind of fetish on pyjamas? Hmmm... weird...

[budakkerek]

hihihi...
it feels good, to know that ppl like you... *boost my ego hahah * :P
but, when it gets to such level, (he tells everyone you're his wife to be etc), that's not besh..that's FREAKY!!

anyway, just glad he's off my stalkers list 8O

Hmm...dont worry, fish-sensei! one gone, a few more come in hehehe :D

hmm..anyway, is the word b****** stands for bitchier? coz i cant think of a more strong b word heheh...

hmm..bleh thn..but i like the first gurl...that was VERY VERY mean, what she did...i mean, she gained sthing (a lot actually LOL) fr the rship

Hmm..dont forget to gimme a call!! cant wait to see you... :wink:

anyway, what happened to the Korean guy? was he the only one who ever invited you to such event? were there any other 'interesting' events in Jpn?v :wink:

[misled_youth]

Confession: misled_youth is in love. *sob sob. Rationality was thrown out the window 3 days ago. *sob sob.

Guys, take it from me. Don't fall for the love trap. *sob sob sob

misled_youth cannot believe that he has allowed himself to be completely destroyed.

I guess I'm mortal afterall.

Back to reality! Watch out world!
________
Paxil Lawsuits (http://www.classactionsettlements.org/lawsuit/paxil/)

[chillout]

super lost in this thread.. what's happening ere?

[jiinjoo]

Nothing :) you just felt loved. It's a sensation you get by reading this thread :)

[Kevinlim]

Here is a situation for you people to ponder upon. I would like to get some opinion about it too.

I have a friend, a girl, she rejected guy that likes her but later she found out that she liked him but the guy already liked another girl. The guy don't know the girl liked him. So what do you guys think is proper?

[Steppe]

All these love things are going in circles....hehehe. I suppose this is part of life and growing up?

I think the girl should tell the guy if she feels strongly about her feelings, give herself a chance to clarify things up for herself?, although there is the risk now that the boy will reject her as he is 'attached' already and it is not fair to his current girl friend.

However, at least, even if she is being rejected now, she will feel relief? (have a strong reason to convince herself that the guy does not /no longer like her any more) and give him up or else perhaps she may feel that at the bottom of her heart, this 'liking etc' may 'haunt' her, she may regret for the rest of her life? especially if it is first love?, she has never told the guy, she has never tried and gave it a second chance, she has not done this or that or regret this or that, etc. etc.....

Or, she might feel that she had made a fool out of herself when she is now being rejected by the guy.

Well, nobody can advise and say for sure what will happen. She has to try to find out herself, to get herself out of the 'misery' of 'secret admiring'?

I am impressed by the 'latest American idol' William Hung who did not know how to dance and sing and yet he went for the American Idol 'competition'. I admired him for his bravery/courage to try it despite his so obvious inadequacies (and subject to people laughing at his 'lousy' singing). He has said something along this line/meaning :

"Whatever you do, try your best. Do not regret of what you have done now and do not have to think too far ahead" something like that.

Thinking back, it is true that I can only give it my best shot in SPM exams, in JPA application etc..Whether I succeed or fail, I have tried and no regrets. No JPA, at least I have tried and appealed, then move on, and try to learn to adopt the attitude of taking up what comes along next.

My parents have been trying to tell/advise us the above, try our best, if make mistakes, learn from it and move on.

Hahaha.....it is always easier said than done.

[Kevinlim]

Of course it is easily said than done everything.....

From my point of view, the chance of that girl being rejected is 100% do u still think she should confess? I asked the guy jokingly if he will accept his 1st crush if she likes him now, he said no. I think better not try :P She's getting over things now. It's not her 1st love.

[iQing]

my first love is honest to me.
she told me how good I am and confess that she likes me, she miss me etc.
I felt so touched.
and I have accepted her 100%

notbody is completely same in this world.
some may get scared, but some people may accept.

[Steppe]

Kevinlim, since you have done the initial sensing for her, then perhaps she should not try. Did she talk to the guy herself? She should be able to sense it for herself whether the guy still liked her or not, girl intuition as girl is usually more sensitive eh?

Anyway, since she can get over it, let the matter settled. She should just forget the guy, tell her it is not worth it, just take it as part of growing up and move on.

My parents used to tell us this,
" if a guy is serious, then the guy's liking should sustain for some time and wait for the girl. If it can be so easily 'crushed', then the liking or so-called love is simply just a puppy love/liking, will not last. So, it is not worth it, drop it and move on."

I remember in the earlier posts of this thread, someone mentioned that he was able to let go the girl and he felt happy when he saw the girl being happy with someone else. That liking is really something.


So, IQing, you are lucky.

[iQing]

thanx Steppe.

here?s a link if u r interested to read about love stories...
it?s in ReCom WATPL SIG

http://recom.homelinux.org:8000/~recom/modules.php?name=Forums&file=viewtopic&t=1166#25255


------------

here I wanna share an article with u
it?s written by a friend of mine

*****


Appreciate when love is still around





As time passes by, we tend to take loads and loads of things for granted. Especially in love. Why?
It may be due to the fact that we are being taken care of and being loved, being pampered...and everything lovely.

Just like the movie, Moulin Rouge...once there is
TRUTH - from words spoken
BEAUTY - from within
FREEDOM - being able to choose to be together
then, comes LOVE which is priceless and unconditional.

Love always decide our future as it mentally affects us directly or indirectly more than anything else - especially girls ( being the more emotional being ).

A friend once told me that though we may never expect our loved one to treat us like how we wanted to, yet, he/she may have done so in their own ways. Arguments always start from misunderstanding because of differences in personality and character.
And this difference is what brings one party and another together so that we would be able to know, learn and understand one another.

Never complain why one party behaves in a certain manner when you never do so, cos you yourself may have triggered some undesired talk or an annoying behaviour that the other party feels irritated.

Every person has its pros and cons in leading his/her life. We should instead look at the better perspective of one and appreciate it cos, you may lose out on that point.

One shouldn't compare in a relationship. If one still insists, then look at the differences and appreciate that he/she is still with you. I'm sure girls hurt more than the men, as when she would like to disagree, the man may not like it. and that she couldn't voice up her dislike, cos the man would think that she's trying to trigger a havoc.

Girls have the desire to remember the past. Cos, as I said earlier, girls are the more emotional party and they would always take everything seriously (affecting their mental well-being). That's why they hurt so much...and a hurt to them is like thousands of nails pricking into their hearts. Every single hurt(though uncountable)allows thousands of undesired pain attacking them.
Therefore, it may not be easy for a girl to forget what they had been through.
Guys may not feel the same as they are...mm...the type - "take it or leave it"
Think of the good points he/she had done for you which in your past, was never given or pampered to.

So, you guys out there...never hurt your gf. Instead, learn to understand by talking to them. Appreciate them before it's too late.

Just note that if your heart doesn't belong to the one you love at the moment, let go. As for guys, they want to own everything or nothing at all- it's their nature and their ego.

Follow your feelings. If one feels like doing something which hasn't been done, go ahead with it. or, you'll regret in the future for not even attempting.

Not until I talked to a very close friend whom I respect fully, only then, I knew what I was supposed to do , I finally followed what my heart desires and I never regretted doing so...cos I never knew I was being cherished all these while I'm not around for and I know how important my life is to these people.

I will never regret what I had done, not anymore. Cos I finally opened my heart and let it do the talking.

Remember...
THE BEST HAPPINESS IS TO LOVE AND BEING LOVED IN RETURN...

If I could make one wish...I would wish for girls to be really understanding and not behave childishly and for the guys to let go their EGO.
Both parties have to do their part for love to bloom.

Happiness is there..it's just a matter of how you want to see and choose it.

[Steppe]

IQing, thanks for the interesting article. The author sure knows about love and seems understanding.

I will go through the love stories thread in near future, too much to read at the moment as I joined Recom not too long ago.

[Kevinlim]

My parents used to tell us this,
" if a guy is serious, then the guy's liking should sustain for some time and wait for the girl. If it can be so easily 'crushed', then the liking or so-called love is simply just a puppy love/liking, will not last. So, it is not worth it, drop it and move on."

agree...if a guy really likes that girl, he'll wait and c till the gal is happy b4 he moves on :P i'm not sure bout this guy, but last time whe he told me that he liked this gal, he said he like her very very much and he told me she'll be the only gal he like.... at that time i was thinking and telling myself and him that it won't happen. now that he liked another gal adi after being rejected, i asked him bout what he claimed last time, he said he's being silly the other time... so do u guys think that he's serious when he said that he liked the gal very very much the other time? if that'sso, how can he change so fast? it's juz a year...

[Steppe]

Maybe your friend did feel that way then. Well, I suppose, one's feeling/liking changes over time.

My mother had said that somehow all those 'boy/girl' liking etc. especially at college level or Form 6 would not last. She had seen so many cases during her time in Form 6 decades ago. Some had vowed so seriously at the moment of time then and yet when even at the same local university (different courses) later, they changed their feelings/likings and went separate ways.

My parents used to say that perhaps at the college level, the boy or girl is still immature in their thinking etc. Hence, the change. Besides, the future fate of both the boy or girl is not known. they may end up in separate U in different places, meet different people and hence end up with different partners later.

[Kevinlim]

if that's so, how can he change so fast? it's juz a year...

well..in this kind of cases, i don't think u can really blame him. after all, he had gone thru his share of pain trying to get over the girl. that must have been some real pain liking someone who doesn't want to return your love. so, it's actually really up to him to decide who he really likes. not up to us to judge his character. As for the girl, i also think that she should keep it to herself. And since she's already on the road towards getting over him, good for her. it's definitely not an easy thing to do. love hurts...

Well love hurts.... But don't u think it's a lil wasted? If the guy had waited a lil more longer, thing's will be juz fine for him :P this had become a case like Pandaboy's. I'm not blaming the guy for likeing another girl. Juz felt a lil wasted. But what the heck, love is complicated :P

My parents used to say that perhaps at the college level, the boy or girl is still immature in their thinking etc. Hence, the change. Besides, the future fate of both the boy or girl is not known. they may end up in separate U in different places, meet different people and hence end up with different partners later

haha, I think that's what all parents tell their children coz that what my mom told me, my bro n my sis :P Interesting huh? LIfe is full of changes and this is what makes life unpredictable and fun :D

[pandaboy]

Well love hurts.... But don't u think it's a lil wasted? If the guy had waited a lil more longer, thing's will be juz fine for him :P this had become a case like Pandaboy's. I'm not blaming the guy for likeing another girl. Juz felt a lil wasted. But what the heck, love is complicated :P

huh.....which case are u referring to?

[Kevinlim]

Ahaha, the one that u said u approached a gal, den she rejected u and u went on with ur life and forgot about her. then later she told u if u had waited longer she would have accepted u... that case, if i'm not mistaken :P

[iQing]

Ahaha, the one that u said u approached a gal, den she rejected u and u went on with ur life and forgot about her. then later she told u if u had waited longer she would have accepted u... that case, if i'm not mistaken :P


personally I really don?t like this kind of girl.

[pandaboy]

Ahaha, the one that u said u approached a gal, den she rejected u and u went on with ur life and forgot about her. then later she told u if u had waited longer she would have accepted u... that case, if i'm not mistaken :P

Wow, u can still remember ar? Good job ler....

Btw, its all over for me and her. She also got a bf herself.

And iQing, why u dont like this girl? She has a point too. If i can forget her so easily, it means that I'm not very serious or not very in love with her. Though it may be true, I dont quite agree la, for my case.

[Kevinlim]

This type of gal is the careful type. She doesn't want to start a relationship and ending breaking up. She juz wanna see how much u love her. I think that's the case la... Juz a speculation.

and iQing, u don't like this type of gal? then what type of gal u like? :oops:

[pandaboy]

This type of gal is the careful type. She doesn't want to start a relationship and ending breaking up. She juz wanna see how much u love her. I think that's the case la... Juz a speculation.

and iQing, u don't like this type of gal? then what type of gal u like? :oops:

Yeah, I kinda agree with ur speculation too.

I think iQing did mentioned that he likes older girls somewhere in the WATPL SIG. Is it true?

How about u, Kevin?

[iQing]

hey pandaboy..
age have nothing to do with this gal...

dun cakap mabuk mabuk..

[pandaboy]

hey pandaboy..
age have nothing to do with this gal...

dun cakap mabuk mabuk..

Okie, I'm sorry.
So what kind of girl do u like? *to answer kevin's question*

[Kevinlim]

Girl I like? not so sure.... coz in my 19 years of life, I only liked one girl. if u want me to describe that gal? she's juz normal lo.... i duno la, i juz like her for what she is..... :oops: den u pandaboy? ur dream gal? u have a gf now?

[pandaboy]

den u pandaboy? ur dream gal? u have a gf now?

That's a very private question. Let's discuss this somewhere else, shall we? :)

Talking about dream girl, the girl I'm in love with does not need to be exactly like my dream girl. Sometimes, that person will not be anywhere near our dream girl's attributes. Love is like magic. That's why we dont need reasons to fall in love with someone. Rite? :wink:

[misled_youth]

Girl I like? not so sure.... coz in my 19 years of life, I only liked one girl. if u want me to describe that gal? she's juz normal lo.... i duno la, i juz like her for what she is.....

In the immortal words of Ross Jeffries:

"Go date 10 other hot babes and see if she's still special".

But then again, almost everyone I know (except for the natural players), has fallen for the "that-one-special-girl" trap. Yeah yeah... including your's truly.
________
MEDICAL MARIJUANA SEEDS (http://marijuanaseeds.org/)

[ElansarGelmir]

But then again, almost everyone I know (except for the natural players), has fallen for the "that-one-special-girl" trap. Yeah yeah... including your's truly.

Hmm... Do girls enjoy the game of the players?

[Kevinlim]

Talking about dream girl, the girl I'm in love with does not need to be exactly like my dream girl. Sometimes, that person will not be anywhere near our dream girl's attributes. Love is like magic. That's why we dont need reasons to fall in love with someone. Rite? :wink:

I totally agree with u pandaboy. :P

But then again, almost everyone I know (except for the natural players), has fallen for the "that-one-special-girl" trap. Yeah yeah... including your's truly

ahaha, think i'll be one of them too... :oops:

[PeiWen]

I always tell myself not to give a damn to those who don't know how to appreciate me. But, love is just too abstract and undescribable. When you love someone, albeit he/she might not like you, but you'll just stick to her/him, maybe hoping that he/she will finally accept you. However, too much of trying and waiting will eventually make one exhausted and finally let him/her go. Perhaps, when you love someone, it's not a matter of being with him/her, but to see him/her happy, and set him/her free.

[kucingbiru]

Perhaps, when you love someone, it's not a matter of being with him/her, but to see him/her happy, and set him/her free.

now that's what i call an unselfish love.

[gal_flower]

But then again, almost everyone I know (except for the natural players), has fallen for the "that-one-special-girl" trap. Yeah yeah... including your's truly.

Hmm... Do girls enjoy the game of the players?

do u seriously think tad when it comes to love, someone has to take the blame? like one gender for example? i believe tad whatever it is, both sex are liable of doin the same thing...in this case, maybe the game of the players.

wad do u GUYS (literally) think of gals who approach u n tell u tad she likes u??

[jagganatha]

well imho i guess a little shocked at first and perhaps i'll take a little consideration..then make the final decision.. :wink: :wink:

[ElansarGelmir]

Errm... personally, i LOATHE players... not those who break up and move on, but those who breaks up on purpose coz there are better guys/gals out there or those who like to be in 2 or more relationships at the same time...

For that kinda gals, well, of course must know her a bit b4 we can justify her courage (if she's some decent/well behaved gal) or her flirting (if she's the opposite of the former). U can't judge someone solely on one action, yes? That would be unfair... but seriously, i dun think i will know how to answer her lor... Misled Youth, can advise arr?

[littlebigone]

Girl I like? not so sure.... coz in my 19 years of life, I only liked one girl. if u want me to describe that gal? she's juz normal lo.... i duno la, i juz like her for what she is.....

In the immortal words of Ross Jeffries:

"Go date 10 other hot babes and see if she's still special".



great advice. I think I'l take it. First i gotto find 10 hot girls in Ithaca blind enough to date me.

My ex/on-a-break girlfriend and I are doing this rite now to see if we'll still find each other special. She's getting on fine with this arrangement but I'm having a little trouble letting go. sigh...very very very weird situation.

[gal_flower]

so how r u getting by? i mean, i donno, but if it were me, i'd b kinda lost?

[jagganatha]

Ya i agree.. how are you doing :?: :?:

[pandaboy]

great advice. I think I'l take it. First i gotto find 10 hot girls in Ithaca blind enough to date me.

My ex/on-a-break girlfriend and I are doing this rite now to see if we'll still find each other special. She's getting on fine with this arrangement but I'm having a little trouble letting go. sigh...very very very weird situation.

wah ser...serious? Er.... i dont quite understand the purpose of doing this la.... :?

[chiunlin]

Any more love/relationships problems to share?

[budakkerek]

my love life is going on fine..but the fact that we dont see each other much makes me miss him even more..any ideas how to solve this? :wink:

[phantom]

my love life is going on fine..but the fact that we dont see each other much (live) makes me miss him even more..any ideas how to solve this? :wink:


dump him and go date with 10 hot hunks who are closer to you.

[budakkerek]

hey..phantom...bad..very very bad...i cant do that...that would definitely hurt him..and me of course..you cant just dump someone like dat...

[phantom]

Girl I like? not so sure.... coz in my 19 years of life, I only liked one girl. if u want me to describe that gal? she's juz normal lo.... i duno la, i juz like her for what she is..... :oops: den u pandaboy? ur dream gal? u have a gf now?

well,love urgh?

i dont know with you guys,but the way i was brought up pinpointed that if you love someone,you must love that person till death,marry her,take care of her and eventually make her as ur trophy wife.

sigh.sigh.

destiny has another saying.

the girl i am in love since i am 17 is now having a well-known bf (her bf is so so famous that once someone here mentioned his name ).

on the day she told me about this,she said this to me:

"yeas,he is a special man in my life now,we agree to enter relationship and i am very very very happy now".

being mad and sad.i didn't talk with her for few weeks till one day she messaged me on the msn and we quarrelled.and she said this:

"if u love me,you should be happy that i am happy now".

how crap was that?

sigh.i should forget her by now,but even as 9 months have passed since then,she still roams inside my brain.crap.such a waste of time.instead of having fun outside,here i am,fearing my future.i feared the day she will get marry and have kids and treat me like another man found by chance,never a foe,never a friend.

but then again,1st love is always the best.the most memorable.the greatest of all.

but the freakin thing is,it seems like another cruel cycle.especially when you read her bf's website and all these craps praising him.and especially when you see both of them taking pics together and pasting it online wherever they can ( like telling hey look at us,forget brad pitt and jeniffer aniston,we are the real true happy couple of the year!!)

at the end of day,you realized it's a dog-eat-dog's world where you have to learn to be a great man and beat the rest of the man in this whole wide world.

enough.yawn.

[fish]

I hope you don't mind me guessing but...

Kerek, don't tell me that your new boyfriend is that guy....THAT one which you told me about.....I mean he being not in KL and, oh did you chat with him alot?

[bubblesgirl]

Budakkerek wrote:


my love life is going on fine..but the fact that we dont see each other much (live) makes me miss him even more..any ideas how to solve this?




well..does he often online??i think both of u can have a try on using web-camera lerr....which u can see and chat with each other everyday,even every moment , moreover it saves money too :)

[fish]

Hi BubblesGirl! Which part of Japan are you in? Friends of SengChye?

[budakkerek]

hahaha...what make you think so, Fish-sensei?

Hmm...chatting IS a most favourable option. But time is the problem. Which made me think of another question:

Do you guys think long-distance relationship can work?

p/s: two of our recommers got engaged last summer...wonder who they were :lol: :lol:

[chiunlin]

Do you guys think long-distance relationship can work?
Reasons why it can't work?

[budakkerek]

expensive ph calls
partner not so techno/net inclined
both find it troublesome
frequency of meeting very small

stuff like dat

[fish]

ceh, not techno/net inclined...that does elimate the candidate I had in mind

[Ic3b3rg]

long distance relationships? neva believed they will work...dunno why.....just neva did... though i have seen ppl " working at it" and perhaps will live happily ever after ........... hmm to all those in these relationships, good luck!!!!

[budakkerek]

Fish...the candidate you hv in mind...lemme know who..but thru PM not thru message board aite? dont want my rahsia to terbongkar hahaha...

Iceberg, thanks! wish me luck!!

what i think? long distance can only work..if both really work hard at maintaining it, and both understand each other's prob well, and both know the priorities...then should be no prob...after all, if you really want it, you'll work hard at keeping it too right?

[chiunlin]

We do have two or three other examples going on... perhaps we should see what will happen to them in the future. Frankly speaking, if you have seen them together or see their testimonials to each other, you would have hardly doubted that the relationship will last, at least for quite some time.

[zAiTsEv]

what i think? long distance can only work..if both really work hard at maintaining it, and both understand each other's prob well, and both know the priorities...then should be no prob...after all, if you really want it, you'll work hard at keeping it too right?

can't agree more! if there's a will, there's always a way!

[chiunlin]

what i think? long distance can only work..if both really work hard at maintaining it, and both understand each other's prob well, and both know the priorities...then should be no prob...after all, if you really want it, you'll work hard at keeping it too right?

can't agree more! if there's a will, there's always a way!
Don't forget to invite us to your wedding in the future. :D :D

[zAiTsEv]

I will. Don't worry.

[budakkerek]

hehe..some recommers got engaged last summer...i dont wanna pecah lobang :D ..but that's an example of a long-distance relationship that worked out..Good luck to them.. :wink:

being in a relationship is fun...suddenly the world seems brighter, your senses are somehow heightened and you feel so happy..and it does make you a nicer person (in most cases - not talking bout the paranoid bf/gf thing here :wink: )

but being in one, requires a lot of small sacrifices...somehow, you gotta include that other person in your already busy life..and you gotta work things out..so your priorities are kinda the same..know what you and your partner wants in a relationship and work along it - that's what i think should be it.

I had a tough time...deciding..but yeah, knowing myself..love is a battlefield (Jennifer Garner - 13 going 30)..i knew i had to go in there..and fight for that right..to be the only one in the land of his heart..up until now, i hv no regrets of doing so...hope so it'll end where i want it to end..

God..sorry ppl..i'm babbling..havent been THIS happy for quite some time..but i guess, like i said..love changes a person..from an already happy person to a more crazier happy kinda person hihiih

good luck
to the single ones out there - the searching part is the best part, you get to "survey the market" :wink:

to the ones about to get into a relationship: have fun finding out bout each other, hv fun but always be on the lookout...that way you wont feel too hurt if the r/ship doesnt work out

to the ones in a relationship: well...what can i say other than, invite me to you weddings! :D Have fun taking care of your significant other..and remember, play nice..dont play around aite? *more like pesanan to diri seniri hahah* 8O

hmm..what else? well...go out..look for love!!

[jagganatha]

Ya heard from seniors here at UMICH that one of them got married also.. lets see how things go by.. Good Luck to long distance relationship believers.. :wink: :wink: that includes me..

[zAiTsEv]

Ya heard from seniors here at UMICH that one of them got married also.. lets see how things go by.. Good Luck to long distance relationship believers.. :wink: :wink: that includes me..

me 2!

[bubblesgirl]

budakkerek wrote:

long distance can only work..if both really work hard at maintaining it, and both understand each other's prob well, and both know the priorities


totally agree !!:wink: ++ Long Distance can only work with a good trust to each other too!!

P/s* to Fish :)
hello, i am in Niigata now..If u are free, please drop by,k?....then i will treat u with Niigatta meibutsu-->笹団子 :D ..yupe,i know Schye ..In fact he is my senior :roll:

[phantom]

Long distance relationship might or might not work.it is somehow expensive too.calling ur significant others every now and then might eventually dry ur wallet.but anyone who cherish sonnet 18,wont mind.

well,why dont u guys get engaged.at least there this black and white telling that he is urs and u r his.then again,match is made in heaven.and e'thing happens for a reason.

well,not to spoilt ur hot love or whatsoever,enjoy these moments becoz 10 years down the road,you never know how hot the temperatute might be in this cup of tea ppl called love.

[budakkerek]

aha...niisang...senpai nee?

some ppl believe that long distance rships can work..some juz dont..i, of course..believe wholeheartedly that such rship can work out juz as fine...coz why? i believe.

anyway, some of my friends did ask me..
how can you be sure that he's not playing around, meeting other gurls and stuff?

my reply?

look..even if he's here beside me, i wouldnt know whether he has another gurl or not somewhere out there...he can keep secrets from me, n there;s nothing i can do to prevent that...
But what i can do is keep my side of the promise (keep his trust), and trust him and just pray hard that he does the same thing. I dont believe in controlling my partner..coz like the famous saying goes," let your love go and if he comes back to you..then he's yours..if he doesn't, heck..just go look for a new one (the last part..that's entirely mine - the original was sthing else :P )

being in a long-distance rship taught me that stimes...you gotta be ready to give in..and not think of yourself all the time..i've become less selfish and more undertsanding i guess....i try to be supportive of him...though stimes, i feel like it's kinda frustrating coz he can't see and feel me...he cant see whether i'm for real or just saying words..But like i said..i gotta try and do my part..and pray hard he does his.

Although stimes, it's kinda frustrating coz you cant see each other as often, talk on the often as long..but hey...i'm loving this life of mine...And i hope you are too :D

bottomline - regardless of which rship u are in, you gotta hv trust to make it work.

Simple, aint it?

[debbie]

*laughs & laughs* I don't know why but at this moment, this whole thing occurs to me as hillarious. Well... love, love, love. You know the saying "Love is blind"? It's not relevant. Utter nonsense. I've loved my music for 14 yrs and i don't count myself blinded.
It's lovers who are blinded. My sister thinks this tan basketballer is so gorgeous and they've been "advancing" little by little. To me, THAT is blind! Can't she see that he is so bland? So yucko? So sticky thin?*shakes head* Funny .. And my best friend is in love with a Michigan Ann Arbour graduate who is so tall and so pale! Ai... blinded la...
Like phantom , I believe in "going the whole way" as in marrying tht person and being faithful and together until ..forever. Yeah. So tht's one of the reasons I'm the anti-flirting kind. I don't wanna have a string of bfs before i get married so all this while, I've said no to the ppl who asked. I know for sure I will never end up with any of them cos forever is a long, long time and they can't stand against the test of time.^_^ Forever is a long, long, long time. Very long.
Good luck to all you lovers and Kerek...perseverance certainly pays.... I'l make sure tht enters my comic.^_^

[budakkerek]

hahah...debbie..debbie...that's why they say, "love is blind" coz when u are in love, everything seems nice and pretty, even when it's actually not. but i guess that's the cool thing bout love - it makes ppl seem perfect. i'd want my significant other to think i'm perfect (though i am not) coz to me, he's my perfect one :D

anyway, flirting is a fun thing to do..as long as you know what you are doing (refer to previous posts by me and Fish - you'll get what i mean hehehe)

but well..honestly, although i do enjoy flirting, once i'm in a committed rship, i stop all that. coz why? dont want my significant other to feel like i'm juz playing around. honestly, i want the rship i'm in to end w marriage...but stimes, what we plan is not what happens, get what i mean? it's still a trial and error thing. but that should nvr stop you fr giving ur all...

Well...hv fun..and debbie, thanks for the g luck wish! :wink: g luck w yer comic gurl!

[tensaispira]

*laughs & laughs* I don't know why but at this moment, this whole thing occurs to me as hillarious. Well... love, love, love. You know the saying "Love is blind"? It's not relevant. Utter nonsense. I've loved my music for 14 yrs and i don't count myself blinded.
It's lovers who are blinded. My sister thinks this tan basketballer is so gorgeous and they've been "advancing" little by little. To me, THAT is blind! Can't she see that he is so bland? So yucko? So sticky thin?*shakes head* Funny .. And my best friend is in love with a Michigan Ann Arbour graduate who is so tall and so pale! Ai... blinded la...
Like phantom , I believe in "going the whole way" as in marrying tht person and being faithful and together until ..forever. Yeah. So tht's one of the reasons I'm the anti-flirting kind. I don't wanna have a string of bfs before i get married so all this while, I've said no to the ppl who asked. I know for sure I will never end up with any of them cos forever is a long, long time and they can't stand against the test of time.^_^ Forever is a long, long, long time. Very long.
Good luck to all you lovers and Kerek...perseverance certainly pays.... I'l make sure tht enters my comic.^_^

*narrows eyes*
Very amusing 'hime-sama.
And very comforting too.